On Fire Inside
by InsideOutsideWithin2468
Summary: Athena Medici is a survivor in her own right, a witch, a friend to some and a foe to others. While fighting the battles in Mystic Falls and fighting her own personal mental ones, will she find love or will she simply just be burned. OC/ Damon, Stefan, Elijah, Klaus, Kol
1. Chapter 1

**The story is going to start off pretty depressing, unfortunately, writing has always been a way for me to get my feelings out of myself before they cause permanent damage to my insides, so I'm going to write.**

**I just wanted to add both a trigger warning for mentions of rape and self harm.**

She didn't like herself. But then again no one really did, that fact didn't make her special.

Nothing she did made her special.

There was a reason she changed her name; Lyla Medici wasn't a happy little girl. She has to admit however that, Athena Medici is not a particularly happy young adult. She stopped being happy a long time ago.

But at least Athena, could wipe away Lyla's existence. Erase her, and remove that part of herself.

Athena has already lamented all the things she lost her sophomore year of high school. They've been listed and they don't really need to be said again; it'd just be another painful reminder of who she is and who she isn't. She knows her past better than anybody else, which is why her world seems to break that much more when her friendship with Elena Gilbert ends.

_"You don't know what's it's like to lose your parents-"_

_Elena's voice had cut off then, quiet and quivering. It seems she had forgotten that today was the third year anniversary of their deaths, like most others did, that Athena was present when her mother killed her father...and then herself._

_Athena had kept her face passive, controlled. Nothing visible._

_"It's different," Elena said so suddenly it hurt, "My parents actually loved me."_

Everything seems to fracture around her, and she's not sure if her world is really crumbling or if it's the mixture of tears and mascara muddling her eyesight. Either way, nothing is right and everything is ruined. But she's Athena Medici and nobody seems to see the sadness in her eyes, so she excuses herself to the bathroom and she cleans herself up.

Nobody can say that Athena Medici doesn't know how to save face.

She smiles a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes when she hooks her arm around Bonnie's, and they stay the rest of the night even though her heart breaks a little more every time she breathes. Bonnie doesn't notice and she doesn't expect her to, but it's okay because she has a plan.

At the end of the night, she steps into the warm spring air with Bonnie at her side. Bonnie is always the one at her side.

Caroline sees them and gives her best smile before offering them rides home. It's just a little awkward, Athena thinks, but Care is oblivious and Bonnie is to secure in herself to care, so she'll endure it this one time. Caroline drops Bonnie off first, which eases some of the tension, but then both of them are trying to ignore the big rift in their friend group.

They stop at Athena's house next, and when she looks out the window at the mansion that's not a home, she has to swallow back the pain that makes her want to cry out and grab hold of the nearest body for strength and comfort. She smiles a fake smile again, and Caroline looks at her curiously because she can see right through it but seems to dismiss it. She takes her keys from her pocket and the gentle clack of heels on paving stones resonates through the darkness as she approaches the front door, unlocks it, and slips inside.

The lights are off and she knows her uncle isn't home so she doesn't bother turning any on as she passes through the foyer and up the stairs to the bathroom attached to the bedroom that doesn't feel like hers anymore. She slides her feet out of her shoes and kicks them into a corner as she closes the door and locks it behind her.

The linoleum is cool and refreshing against her tired feet and she takes a moment to revel in the sensation before she steps onto the warmer bath mat and reaches for the knobs in the shower.

She cranks the hot water up all the way, and the small enclosed space quickly fills with steam and heat. The mirror fogs and she wipes it clean with a single swipe of her palm, and she takes one good look at her reflection before she turns away.

She doesn't bother taking off her dress as she steps beneath the beating stream of hot water.

She doesn't feel its scalding sting as she lowers herself in tub. She reaches for her shaving razor and it takes her a second to pop the removable head from the handle. She's never done this before, and she cuts herself as she tries to remove one of the single blades. She almost decides to turn back, but then one of them comes free and she holds the sliver of metal between her thumb and forefinger.

She's not sure how to do this, but she's heard stories and jokes so she has some idea.

She catches her bottom lip between her teeth and bites down as she presses the blade against her flesh and draws it from hand to elbow in one long gash. It hurts more than she thought it would, but there's already so much blood that she's sure she did it right. It's harder to hold the blade in her left hand and she's starting to feel a little dizzy, but she manages to repeat the action on her right arm but the line is a little less straight and a little less clean. It's done, she thinks, as she drops the blood-stained blade over the side of the tub and then lets her arms fall tiredly at her side.

Her eyes begin to flutter closed, and she catches a glimpse of crimson seeping into her once-beautiful-now-ruined dress and she thinks it's symbolic of all the bad creeping into her once-wonderful life. Marring it. Staining it. Ruining it.

Her mind is growing fuzzy when she hears somebody on the other side of the door, and she thinks it might be Caroline. She hears a clipped version of, "Hey my best bitch, you left your phone in my car again." She doesn't answer, and then there's a knock on the door which turns into pounding and then shouting but Athena's too tired to care.

She hears the door break open and then there's screaming and crying and the beating of the water on her face is gone and somebody's wrapping something soft around her arms. Athena struggles to open her eyes, to tell Caroline to go away, but she feels strong arms lift her out of the tub and then she's resting on the bathroom mat and Caroline is hovering over her and she sees her swearing loudly into a phone.

Yelling at her mother in a way Caroline never has.

She tries to shake her head violently, to tell her no, but she can't muster the strength but she can't go back to sleep with the knowledge of the haunted look that painted Caroline's face, so she tries to stay awake for her, to listen to her.

Athena isn't sure how much time has passed when men in uniforms arrive, but it takes a police officer to hold Caroline back when the blonde tries to jump into the back of the ambulance with her.

She loses consciousness before they reach the hospital, and when she wakes up, all there is to greet her is the steady blips and beeps of machines attached to her, and she thinks she's back where she started.

Alone.

* * *

Her uncle doesn't want her to go to a psychiatric facility, even a temporary one, for which Athena is grateful.

Instead the nurses hover carefully near her private room, but she thinks this is much better than the alternative. She isn't crazy; she's just sad and maybe a little broken.

When she opens her eyes again, she expects to see her uncle, but instead she finds light eyes and a burning glare. She turns her head away to break the eye contact but is met with an audible growl.

"No, you don't get to pull a stunt like that and look away from me, Medici," Caroline growls, and she marches to the other side of the room to try to catch gold eyes again. "You don't get to slash your wrists and try to take the easy way out. You don't get to-" Athena watches her stony facade crack with every word until it breaks and there are tears and pain and she wants to look away again but can't.

Caroline's on her knees beside the bed now, shaking hands gripping at the sheets as she sobs. Suddenly, Bonnie is there too with wet eyes, and Athena feels sympathy at first, but then the anger is on her in a flash and she's shouting at them.

Then there is a maturity Athena hadn't seen in Caroline before, one that made her step forward and sit in the chair beside her bed. Her hand is resting near hers, but Care seems hesitant to take it, and Athena wants to be angry; she glares at her instead until she sighs and stands. Caroline reaches for something in her backpack.

"I told Elena not to come. If you're not going to let any of us help, maybe you can let this do something," she says sadly, but Athena barely hears her because her eyes are focusing and un-focusing on the open sketchbook in front of her.

Athena wonders how she found it, why she might have been going through her things, but then she realizes that people like answers and she created a really big freaking question when she tried to take her own life.

_Why?_

Her body still feels like somebody pumped her limbs with lead so it takes a little effort to rest her hand on top of the sketchbook. She struggles to trace the lines she once drew in pen (the doctor said she nicked a nerve and may have suffered a minor loss of motor function in her right hand), and she turns her head away so tears won't fall onto the drawing. She wants to throw it across the room, pretend it doesn't exist, but even if she had the physical strength to do so, she's not sure she's ever had the emotional will to do it.

Athena falls asleep crying softly to herself.

* * *

The plan for junior year is simple.

She's going to lose all the excess weight long before school even starts again, and Caroline will help her do it, because even though they have their issues, they're cut from the same ruthless, superficial cloth.

Then she's going to make sure her academic average recovers from sophomore year, because somewhere in between getting jumped, getting kicked out of her house by her uncle, living in her car, declining mental health, losing her best friend and trying to kill herself, neither her first nor second semester exams were what they should of been.

Quite frankly, that is unacceptable.

Athena can't help but berate herself, because all of it is her fault.

The best she can do now is move on, and scale the heights of the Mystic Falls high academic endeavors without looking down, because she will, one day, leave this town and never look back.

* * *

The weight sorts itself out before school starts again because she is both dedicated and smart, and after royally pleading with Caroline, she's even back in her rightful spot as co-captain of the cheerleaders.

During summer cheer camp, all it took was one glare from her to get the other girls to stop talking about the scars on her wrists.

She sees Tyler and Matt sometimes during practices and she can still barely manage to look at either of them, or maybe she just struggles with the way they look at her- like she's a fragile thing, as opposed to a regular girl. (Or according to Tyler, the girl he's been dreaming about sleeping with since he had his first wet dream).

It's both disgusting and flattering that he felt the need to tell her that.

Caroline catches her eyes while she's scanning the football players and raises an eyebrow, but Athena knows better than to take that bait.

"You're killing me out there. You know that?" Athena says stretching her arms to try to get rid of the burn.

Care looks her up and down with a smile. "You can take it."

And then she voluntarily rubs at the sore spot, just for a minute.

* * *

It's towards the end of the summer when she meets Sam.

He's sweet and kind and doesn't stare at her scars like they ruin her.

Almost despite herself, she's amused, and she can't help the sly smile that twitches her lips.

"Oh my God, please tell me you don't actually like that mouth breather now?" Bonnie asks, staring at her when she watches Sam jog over to the field; he always turns halfway, and waves at her in that silly, open way that flies in the face of everything she thought she liked.

"His name is Sam, and we can continue this conversation after you drop and give me twenty," Athena snaps back.

Bonnie's on the ground in an instant barely breaking a sweat after twenty-five,_ bitch,_ looking smug as hell when she gets back up.

"He's a puppy, Athena. He's the kind of guy who's going to date someone...regular. Buy a teddy bear at a carnival or some shit. They'll be happy and have five kids together, and one of them will be named Sam junior, and he'll take Sam junior to baseball games and it'll be a merry old fucking _gay _time."

Athena feels herself harden with every word dripping pointedly from Bonnie's lips.

"What's your point."

For a second Bonnie falters under the intensity of the other girls gaze, realizing what everyone else always talked about. Athena Medici had a depth that regular teenagers didn't know how to handle and being her sole focus is overwhelming...she absently wonders if every person this girl meets is doomed to fall in love with her.

"My point is, you're sharper than that. You would eat him alive in no time. But eventually he will see all you are showing him is a mirror. An echo chamber he could love." Bonnie stopped herself from saying that Athena did that with everyone. Showed them exactly what they wanted. She doubted anyone has ever even glimpsed behind that door, she doubted anyone could handle it.

Athena watches as Bonnie fixes her skirt and heads over to Elena.

* * *

Later that night, Athena looks at her mother's grimorie, dusted and old, and it pains her to see it.

Even still she picks up and pushes her magic to the limits, until it hurts, and by the end of the summer her magic has surpassed what she thought was possible. Her bloodline isn't special like Bonnie's is, but there's something in her. Something that no other witch has.

_Weight, grades, magic, and control. _

It's the first thing she thinks when she wakes up and it's the last thing she thinks when she goes to bed.

Sometimes it feels like the only thing keeping her together.

* * *

It's the first day of school and she feels the eyes of people on her everywhere she turns.

And she absolutely hates it.

Tugging her sleeves down she walks into the administrative office...her incident during the summer had caused the school to 'reccomed' (force) her into mandatory counseling once a week.

A part of her doesn't really feel anything, so she's not sure what she's going to talk about in those things, but Athena's sure she'll find a way to get out of it.

Her gold ones find hazel green ones, a boy, one she's never seen before. The feeling of death surrounds him so thoroughly she almost chokes. He's taken a lot of lives...brutally.

By looking at him, she wouldn't have been able to tell.

She doesn't introduce herself just gets her paperwork and slides out as quickly as she had been there.

_Weight, grades, magic, and control._

None of those encompass teenage vampires who sulk around high schools.

* * *

Stefan felt her before he saw her.

Witches had to be beyond a certain magnitude of power for them to be felt from as far away from her as he did, and when standing beside her and meeting those gold eyes he nearly fell to his knees.

He finds himself frozen, like a deer-in headlights, one of the most gorgeous women he had ever seen before.

With a green blouse draped over her in such a way it left the top of her collarbones exposed with long, wild curls, tight ringlets really that cascaded down to her lower back, golden brown skin, wearing a wry smile on her pretty full rosy lips, looking almost amused at the world around them.

She reminded him of a goddess.

Relaxed and confident, an almost indifferent quality to her demeanor.

It's only after she leaves and he glances at her paperwork, seeing it signed in beautiful caligraphy, "Athena Medici" does it all seem to make sense.

_Athena...at first glance I would assumed she was Aphrodite. _

* * *

In class his eyes bounce between Athena and Elena.

One representing familiarity, the other something entirely new.

Elena looks back, Athena doesn't.

He hears the rumors about both of them.

Elena lost her parents, Athena tried to lose herself.

* * *

He follows her after school, she's changed into shorts and a tank top ( and he doesn't understand how someone that short can have such amazing legs or such wide hips and a round- he stops himself), and the scent of her skin mixed with the pure power drifting off of her is nearly addictive.

Expressive golden eyes stare at him intently, and the stunningly beautiful young woman introduces herself, voice a low hum and the very definition of feigned poiliteness. "I'm Athena."

Her gaze quickly rakes over Stefan, as if accessing him, and she says. "You're the new mysterious guy everyone's been talking about."

He nods in a way that can only be described as frantic, and in realization of that he smiles, sheepish. "Yes that would be me," he confirms combing his hair back from his face, and even though Athena probably already knows his name he adds, "I'm Stefan Salvatore."

"Charmed." Athena smiles at him, a quick quirk at the edge of her lips, and Stefan feels like he's staring directly into the sun. "You should head to the graveyard, that's where Elena goes after school."

"And where do you go after school?"

Her eyes turn steely for a second, almost looking pained, but she hides it before he can ask.

"No where you need to know, Salvatore, go be good for Elena." It isn't a dig, it's lighthearted, nearly sweet, but he can see the wicked amusement in those gold eyes of hers.

This time he's assessing her. Wide amused eyes, dimples, freckles spread across her nose and cheeks, and rosy cheeks on top of golden brown skin. She has a small waist, wide hips and thighs and ass, and petite breasts. His mouth waters only slightly.

This was going to be torture. And speaking of which, the girl raises one perfectly shaped eyebrow, her head tilted. "Did you not hear me darling, _run along and be good for Elena._"

Stefan glares at her, his eyes darkening and the urge to rip into that pretty neck of hers wells up, but all she does is throw her head back, wild curls following as she unknowingly exposes her neck to him, turning around to walk away at a leisure pace, hips swaying. "It was such a pleasure meeting you, Stefan. Hurry up, wouldn't want to keep a girl waiting, would we?"

Stefan goes to the graveyard and ignores that voice in his head telling him he should have followed Athena.

* * *

He only shares history class with Athena.

He had compelled to have at least five with Elena...he didn't realize how badly he would want more with Athena too.

She sits in the front and pushes her glasses up her nose, giving Stefan no more than a passing glance, but just enough to acknowledge him and make his heart do these weird shard injured jumps that make him wince in silent, unbearable pain. Jesus fucking Christ, she was so fucking cute, with her little glasses and her folders lined up neatly and she was so pretty, deadly dark curls and all soft and sweet. Her focus is nearly unbreakable, and he knows that her academic performance is more than impressive.

So it's no real surprise that Tanner doesn't call on the only person listening.

"The Battle of Willow Creek took place right at the end of the war in our very own Mystic Falls. How many casualties resulted in this battle? Ms. Bennett?"

Athena laughs at the way Bonnie looks at her as if begging for help, before the young Bennett sighs and says, "Um...a lot? Like a whole lot."

"Cute becomes dumb in an instant, Ms. Bennett," Athena bites down a laugh at that. Did he just call Bonnie cute. "Mr. Donovan? Would you like to take this opportunity to overcome your embedded jock stereotype?"

Matt raises and drops his shoulders in a little shrug. "It's okay, Mr. Tanner, I'm cool with it."

There's scattered laughter from there classmates before Tanner sets his sharp eyes on Elena. "Hmm. Ms. Gilbert, surely you can enlighten us about one of the town's most significant historical events."

"I'm sorry, I-I don't know." Elena's eyes go wide and doe like as she shrinks just slightly in her chair.

Tanner sneered. "I was willing to be lenient last years for obvious reasons, Elena. But the personal excuses ended with summer break. You know Ms. Medici never allowed her summer experiences to affect her academics-"

Athena flinches before her eyes grew cold and as unfeeling as ice, face pinched in annoyance as she griped the sides of her desks. "Fuck you," the girl named after the goddess growled. "Don't use me as a weapon in this, you complete and utter-"

"There were 364 casualties. Unless you are counting local civilians."

"That's correct. Mister...?"

"Salvatore."

"Salvatore," Tanner repeats leaning back against his desk. He glances at Athena and finds pure fire in her eyes. He quickly looks back at Stefan. "Any relation to the original settlers here at Mystic Falls."

"Distant," Stefan added, he can feel Elena's eyes. He wishes he could feel Athena's.

"Well, very good," The history teacher ground out. "Except of course, there were no civilian casualties in this battle."

"Actually there were 27, sir, confederate soldiers, they fired on the church, believing it to be housing weapons. They were wrong. It was a night of great loss. The founders archives are uh stored in the civil hall if you would like to brush up on your facts, Mr. Tanner."

Class let out soon after that, and Athena wasted no time trying to disappear into the chaos of other students. Stefan didn't let her body leave his line of sight. He stops her by tapping her shoulder, and she turns around more gracefully than anyone should have the right to move.

"So," he starts, and fidgets slightly beneath her eyes. What is wrong with him, talking to Elena was virtually nothing compared to this. But then again, Elena was a beautiful human, this girl was a powerful witch. Magic hanging heavy in the very air around her.

"Yes, Stefan," she drawled patiently, hugging her folders to her chest, her glasses catching the light and gleaming slightly.

His fingers flex and he forces himself to calm down. "I found out about a party that's supposed to happen tonight, a back to school thing, and I was wondering if you planned to be there."

Athena stares at him, before smiling, amused. "You're cute."

"Thank...you?" Stefan replies.

"Mmm," Athena hums, that intent look back gleaming in those eyes of hers. "And no, I had no intention of going. I have some things I need to take care of." But the girl steps forward, a coy smirk on her face doing nothing to settle his nerves. "But on another note," She glances over his shoulder, "thank you for interrupting, I've been told I can be quite vicious and if I was allowed to say what I intended to say...I'm very certain I would've been expelled and that would do nothing to help in my pursuit of valedictorian."

"It was nothing," he replied shortly although he wanted to ask what other pursuits she had.

"It wasn't nothing. Give yourself more credit." Her voice drops a level, more serious and achingly earnest. But something...something in her tone makes Stefan feel uncomfortable. He doubts she gives herself any credit.

Stefan finds himself feeling struck for a moment.

And she laughs, and its so bright and so smooth, he can't imagine this being the same girl who tried to hurt herself, but maybe that's the point. "We're going to have a lot of fun together, aren't we?"

He doesn't get to answer because she's already walking away.

* * *

While everyone else is at the party, Athena goes to her mother's old artifact room.

She had already mastered all the spells in her mother's personal grimorie, now onto her ancestors. She couldn't afford to be weak, not with what Stefan Salvatore's arrival in Mystic Falls would bring right behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

"_Traumatic events, by definition, overwhelm our ability to cope. When the mind becomes flooded with emotion, a circuit breaker is thrown that allows us to survive the experience intact, that is, without becoming psychotic or frying out one of the brain centers. The cost of this blown circuit is emotion frozen within the body. In other words, we often unconsciously stop feeling our trauma partway into it, like a movie that is still going after the sound has been turned off."_

David Medici, uncle of Athena, found himself in a very difficult and dangerous position.

He watched with mounting trepidation as his niece entered the mansion, passing by the hanged portrait of her parents as if it were invisible.

With his hands clasped tightly, he hesitantly granted the young girl his full and undivided attention. They've had their difficulties, he thinks of her wrists and the scars (so similar to the way his younger sister had taken her life all those years before) and he hurts. And then he thinks of how she made her decision, stop practicing magic or leave.

She chose to leave.

The look he found in Athena's eyes, however caused the man's stomach to coil and tighten.

"Do not give me that look."

She sighed, leaning back against the wall. She was dressed richly in a fashionable silk blouse that peppered against her skin, colored in royal red, and her ears adorned with glittering jewlery.

"What have you done?" Asked David slowly, in his familiar yet raspy voice.

Athena's brows quirked upward in response, momentarily, and she challenged him to continue with pursed lips. It was universally understood throughout the Mystic Falls that Athena hated any kind of authority. Rules were boundaries that she despised having in general.

"My mother left them for me."

"Your mother went mad because of her all consuming need to be more powerful," David growled back. "I told you that this was unacceptable and I told you-"

"That you didn't approve," Athena finished, rolling her eyes. "Yes. I know."

She watched as her uncle's jawline tensed and released, knowing her words struck him.

"Where have you been staying?"

The young girl just raised and dropped her shoulders. "Here and there."

"Athena-"

"Why did you invite me here?"

"Because I worry about you."

Athena just stared at him blankly. That's the face that always shook him to the core. The pure emptiness in it.

"I want to move into the servants house."

On the property, there was a home, for individuals back then that housed servants and slaves. It hadn't been used in over a century, a two story thing that was broken down with a large hole in the roof.

"I-"

"You said I can't practice magic and live here, then fine. I won't live here, I'll live there."

"Athena, you don't have the resources required to fix that old thing up. I don't understand why you won't even attempt to consider stopping your use and practice of magic."

Athena simply flexed her fingers, the only outward reaction to everything occurring around her. "Can I just have one thing in my life not burdened by expectation, Uncle. Please. Just this once can you allow me to do something to make me happy."

It was manipulative of her, using the idea of happiness as a tool against her uncle. Either way, it ended just as she expected.

With her new home, not being the inside of her car, but the old broken down home.

A genuine smile brightened her lips.

* * *

She ended up at the party she said she wouldn't attend. Not necessarily to do anything other than find Caroline and share a drink or two.

"Get me a drink," Athena says as soon as she runs into the blonde.

"Fuck off," Care replies. Still with an inebriated giggle she's off towards the direction of drinks, because rather then finding Athena's ways annoying...she finds it endearing, intent on getting Athena one.

While standing around doing absolutely nothing she caught Stefan's eyes. He was on the bridge with Elena, probably falling in love with her (that thought made her inwardly laugh) his eyes latching onto her with such feroicity she nearly wanted to step back.

She's the one to break the eye contact.

Athena wastes no time finding someone to entertain her, that someone being Tyler. It's obvious to everyone that Tyler still has some lingering feelings for the girl, but Athena is inscrutable, a code that can't be cracked, not even by her closest friends.

She laughs at the appropriate times, and says the right things, but it's all so forged it nearly makes Stefan feel sick.

"What happened to her?" Stefan finds himself asking.

Elena follows his gaze to Athena, and he watches her gaze change. For a half-second, she looks like Katherine.

Maybe it was the way Elena tilted her head, but it made Stefan stop and look at her...really look at her. His throat tightened, and he had to force the lump down his throat when he met her doe eyes.

Stefan didn't often think of his life as a human. His past was something he liked to keep crushed down, down where not even whiskey could reel it back up to inspect. There was something in the expression on her face, though, that sent him back.

And it made him want to put as much distance between him and Elena Gilbert as possible.

It was both dark and innocent, conniving yet kind.

"Athena has always been a complicated person." Elena says quietly. "I can't say what happened, because she hasn't really told anyone. We all know what happened. No one knows why."

"Has she always been like that?"

Elena wants to ask him why he cares, but she chalks it up to pure curiosity. Everyone is curious these days. About her. About Stefan. About Athena.

But to be honest...she hadn't ever understood Athena.

She's tried. God, she's tried. It's been a battle over a decade in the making, and still has to admit complete and utter defeat.

Sometimes she is brutal, with the same caustic, vibrant personality at times Elena loathed. Other times, she is torrid and unpredictable in all her glory. She can be horrifying and blistering one moment, all curse words and derogatory insults, only to segue into shocking moments of tenderness before rocketing right back into sarcasm and lewd gestures.

And sometimes she is...calm.

Elena's brown eyes are fixed on the girl, she is the perfect model; quiet, still, apathetic to being watched.

"Yeah," The Gilbert girl says dumbly.

"Yeah," Stefan agrees.

There's a part of Stefan that acknowledges that feeling anything remotely positive towards Athena Medici is always going to result in him getting hurt. It's an inevitability, but he's unsure how to stop it. He reasons Athena would make a good friend. She's kind and attentive, receptive to conversation and he can see the fiereceness in her eyes. That should clinch it, but there's something else; something more.

Stefan thinks it's in her eyes.

There's so much there: secrets and truths, passion and guilt, weariness and concern, regret and eagerness, and pain.

It's a lot, and Stefan can't shake the feeling that he's the only one who can see it.

Conversation passes sluggishly after that, and she can't help but feel a tad bit jealous at the way Stefan's eyes jump over to Athena every now and then like she is the most beautiful thing to ever walk the earth.

But his attention always comes back to Elena, and for now, that is good enough.

* * *

Caroline feels Stefan's words pierce through her, of course she isn't enough. Of freaking course.

Elena was everything, everyone wanted. Beautfiul and sweet and kind and she was just a dumb blonde- she feels a whimper well up in her throat.

Drunk, she stumbles over to Athena, and almost immediately the girl takes Caroline in her arms.

"What happened?"

"Why do you even care?" Caroline snaps.

"Are you kidding me?" Athena snaps right back, pulling away so quickly it was like she was never touching Caroline.

"No. I'm not," Caroline swallows a loud breath of air. Her pain, anger, and sadness boiling outside of her. But even still, pity is the only true expression on her face. "You wouldn't understand."

Athena's eyebrow hitches up, and sober Caroline would recognize that as a dangerous thing. Drunk Caroline doesn't care.

"What the hell does that--"

"I would do anything to be special. To be seen. Anything. You don't want to be seen, Athena. You want to disappear," Caroline's eyes are dark with anger, or something, and Athena almost flinches away from them.

_She remembers being uncomfortable in those stupid plastic chairs that the hospital had, watching countless doctors, nurses, and patients rush past her._

_Caroline's thumb had shakily traced the plastic lid of her coffee that tasted like absolute trash. Hospital coffee is always burnt, she had just begun to realize, but it is just enough to keep her going when she feels like she can't take anymore. Her eyes were burning but she was afraid to blink, afraid to look away from those double doors that determine whether people live or die. Her body aches but she dares to not move from her position. No, she is going to be right there when the doctors finally come out and tell her the news that she has been waiting for. _

"I'm trying, Care. I'm trying everyday to make up for what I did- everyday feels like an apology and I will forever have the sacrs to remind me that I- how does it makes me a bad person that I would like this year to be just a little bit better than last year?" Athena growls at her, because how fucking surreal is this--the second biggest bitch in the school telling her she's heartless.

The words mockingly dance in her mind.

_Weight, grades, magic and control._

This year is going to be perfect, even if she has to punt Caroline off a cliff to make it that way.

There's a blatant change in posture from Athena that throws Caroline off. She holds herself high and her face slides into a mask. It sends a shiver down her spine watching the transformation, and her heart stutters.

"I know it looks like I don't care about anything because I don't parade my feelings around like the rest of you, but I do care...especially about you. So why don't you tell me what happened so I can try and be there for you."

Despite her words, Athena's face is stony mask of indifference.

"I'm sorry," Caroline sobs. "I just wish there would be someone who would look at me first. See me. I'm tired of being the second choice. Not good enough. Not anything, enough."

"There will be other people to see you, Care." Athena directs the taller girls head to her shoulder. "Elena is everything this town loves. She's a founders kid, average grades, helpful around the community. Guys like Stefan, like Matt, they like that. That average girl. But you Care, you're a fucking hurricane. You're passionate and stubborn and so dangerously beautiful- it really is unfair- and one day a guy is going to see you and only you and not be able to take his eyes off of you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. The only person who's in the wrong is Stefan, especially if he's being blinded by Elena enough to willingly hurt you."

Closing her eyes for a moment, Caroline does all she can to fight off a wave of... she has no idea what she's feeling in this moment.

"Thank you, Athena." She wraps her arms around the other's girls waist. "You can't leave me. Okay. I need you."

Caroline's hand, for the first time ever, goes to Athena's arm. To her scars.

"Okay?" The blonde presses.

"I-" Athena closes her eyes and sucks in a harsh breath that hurts. "Yes, okay."

Caroline rubs at her temples, feeling nearly exhausted and the meager light and noise around her, just starting to hurt.

"Do you have a headache?" Athena asks, looking very put together. It's in her appearance only because Caroline can see the misery in her eyes. Anyone who bothered to look would be able to see it.

Caroline gulps. "I think it's just starting."

"Would you like a painkiller?"

The blonde chuckles. "You're a bit of a junkie, aren't you, 'Thena, always carrying those painkillers."

Athena forces a smile that doesn't reach her eyes. "Just don't want anyone else to be in pain," she says softly, digging in her bag for the required pills.

The calculations that rocket through Caroline's mind are visible on her face, and Athena feels her jaw muscles twitch when they briefly linger on pity. That however fades, and the part of Caroline that sticks around is the one filled with sympathy.

And then Athena walks away, ignoring the way Caroline says 'Thena' because it sounds too much like Lyla, and ignores the sympathy on her face because it's just too much.

She rushes to the woods behind a tree, where she sits, alone. Then she digs her nails into her thighs until she's sure she's not going to cry.

It takes a good five minutes.

* * *

She's starting to leave when she sees him, staring at Elena with longing and tinge of sadness in his blue eyes.

"You know going after Vicki like that was pretty pathetic."

The blue eyed man turns his eyes to her, and she watches the affection bleed from his face almost instantly.

"Excuse me."

Athena's lips turned upwards into an amused grin. "I don't know," she says, almost like she's musing to herself. "I was just expecting something more. You know, something really boundary pushing...but it all just fell kind of flat."

Damon leaned forward only slightly, the girl was enveloped in moonlight, small and radiant. Everything about her appearing ethereal; from the way she moved to the smaller, more intimate details, like the twin braids that framed the sides of her narrow face.

Athena Medici.

He's heard rumors about her from the party goers. About her beauty. About what she did to herself. Still nothing could have really prepared him for her charm, his entire chest feeling as though it caved inward.

A familiar smirk slid onto his face.

"I'm not sure what you mean."

Athena lips quirked then. "No?" she asks mockingly.

"No," Damon confirms. "It seems I've yet to introduce myself. I'm Damon, Damon Salvatore. It is truly a _pleasure_ to meet me, I'm sure."

A wild look glimmers in her eyes. "That remains to be seen."

"Oh?" Damon says with false innocence. Athena had no faith in his taste for innocence.

"What can I say," Athena begins, twiling her wild curls around a finger. "I'm not easily distracted."

He prowled closer, the warmth of her skin, the power flowing off of her making his muscles loosen. She was radiant, a queen. A lesser beauty might have been swallowed up by the lavish attire, perhaps overshadowed - but not her. The luxurious red had only accented her natural charms; the shimmering jewels had brought out the brightness in her eyes.

He takes in the red solo cup she holds in her right hand. "I've heard about you, Athena Medici. Alcohol is a rather _decstructive_ coping mechanism, isn't it?"

Athena rolls her eyes unmoved by his snarky comment. "And yours aren't?"

He looks back at her quizzically. "What do you mean by that?"

"Damon your coping mechanisms often require people to die." She deadpans. "Or be seriously injured."

_Yours do to, _Damon wants to say. But he bites that back.

"Clever girl," Damon murmurs, and he smiles. Something in that smile should have scared her, made her uncomfortable. It didnt. She was constantly battling internally, afterall, if it wasn't her uncle toying with her emotions on a regular basis, it was the constant linger of danger weighing heavily on her narrow shoulders.

Sometimes it felt as if she had enemies stretched far and wide.

Athena clears her throat, her nostrils flare, and she defiently raises her chin. She refuses to be cowed by her own embarrassment. "Making the best of what you left behind."

Afterall she didn't need to just level the playing field, she needed to change it.

"You should have just stayed away. Curiosity killed the cat," he smiled mockingly, he got closer and closer, forcing his body into her personal bubble.

"Good thing I got the nine lives along with the curiosity."

He smirked at that.

"It was a lion who attacked your friend-" His pupils dilated.

Compulsion. Really?

"She's not my friend and we are in virgina. A wolf would've really been a better explanation." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Truthfully, Damon Salvatore, what you do doesn't bother me. The idea of you going after someone I care about does."

His first instinct is to lunge and rip her apart, he pushes it down.

"Someone's ignoring their survival instincts," Damon circles her.

"I call it appealing to the bigger predators interest." She lets her eyes dart up and down and over him. "Is it working?"

"Who knows." Damon can't fight the sudden visceral interest that grabs at his mind. "Mercy isn't exclusively reserved to humans."

"Neither is cruelty."

She takes in his attire. All black with a leather jacket. Something about his clothes struck her, as if he were dressed for an escape, at any given moment.

As he approached even closer, Damon regarded Athena thoughtfully with his cool silvery eyes.

His focus is shot when they hear a laugh, turning the both catch Elena and Stefan far off in the distance. The two of them hidden from view within the trees.

"It is all so romantic, isn't it?" She inquired sarcastically, despite her better judgement.

Damon's brow furrowed. He looked as though he made to laugh, but his voice eventually broke past his amused smirk smoothly, "isn't romance what all wonen desire?"

No.

Yes.

Perhaps?

Athena's jaw did a series of pushups as she flattened her hands against her jeans, oddly fidgety beneath Damon's pressing stare. "No I don't think so...What I desire…"

Her voice trailed as she considered her words carefully.

There was a mountain of pressure upon Athena's shoulders, at all times. Not only from herself but from the eyes of everyone around her.

Damon simply watched her patiently – looking almost contented to do so. The look within his eyes -gentle, kind, and eager to listen- scooped Athena up into another momentary bought of grief.

Decidedly sick of feeling sorry for herself, Athena shook her hair back and forth and glanced upwards towards the darkening sky. A songbird flitted through the air, singing to the duo in greeting, and Athena watched as the small creature dipped and soared in playful merriment. How nice it must be, she considered, to be a songbird…

"What I desire right now is to laugh and have fun. I have been lacking in both for a while now." She stated earnestly, observing the small bird until it was lost among the trees. "But that's not why I came to you. Caroline Forbes. Bonnie Bennett. Tyler Lockwood. Matthew Donovan. Remember those names. Those are the people off limits. Under my protection."

He grabs her wrist. His thumb pressing into her skin.

"And how long will that last for?" Damon says haughty, "Until the next time you try and-"

He stops himself, letting the words hang. She can fill in the blank.

Athena's chest began to rise and fall with heavy breaths as Damon's eyes grew ablaze with satisfaction. Her lips twitched, as if she were holding back the desire to snap. Somehow, despite it, her voice came out even and clear, "you came to Mystic Falls for a reason. Help me and I can help you."

"Just like that," he snaped his fingers.

Athena turned her back to him, pulling out of his grip, dismissive. "You help me and I can help you."

She walks away a moment later, and Damon glares on after her, even with the repeat cycle of _what just happened_ playing in his mind.

Women do not walk away from him. There are natural laws about this, surely.

* * *

"Can I do anything for you, Stefan?" Athena mutters her voice airy.

"You need to stay away from Damon." The words are automatic, damn near autocratic and out of his mouth before he can think better of it.

Her eyes almost immediately narrow into furious amber slits, bristling like an angry cat.

"What did you just say?" she asked, her tone flat with barely-constrained wrath. "Because even with standing right here, I couldn't have possibly heard that right."

And her voice steals something from him.

"Athena-"

"Shouldn't you be chasing after Elena?" Her expression goes cold. "After all, you hurt Caroline for her."

"I didn't mean for-"

"No of course you didn't Stefan," She shakes her head. "All you saw was Elena." Her eyes are blazing and beautiful as she enters his space so freely, as if it were her own. "There are better ways to reject someone Stefan, ways without making them feel less."

Without thinking he reaches for her hand. Her skin is so soft and warm, and he can feel her power like electricity humming in her blood. It makes his teeth ache.

Athena felt the vibrations of a low growl against her before she heard the sound. She looked at Stefan in surprise, to find him staring intently at her wrist.

"He marked you."

Athena glanced down to see a small purple smudge on the inside of her wrist, a forming bruise in the shape of a fingerprint.

"I'm not yours to take care of," Athena reminded him.

"You're not his either," he said darkly.

"That," Athena allowed a small smile to come up, "we can agree on." She steps away, purposely. "Don't worry about me. Just go focus on Elena."

"Why are you so intent on pushing me towards Elena?"

Athena laughed then. "Why are you going out of your way to talk to me when you could be with her?"

That's the very same question the youngest Salvatore was asking himself.

He could sense her indifference.

Athena did not care about being here, talking to him. She didn't care about being stared at. She was genuinely calm, as if everything she had experienced rendered her unable to care about such minor things.

God, she smells good. O negative if he's not mistaken. The universal donor.

"Because I want to know you. Is that truly such a bad thing."

Her expression darkens and low laugh falls out of her mouth. "You hurt my friend, Stefan. Right now any expectations I've had of you have fallen short. So excuse me if I don't share your ideals for friendship between us."

Stefan's eyes fill with hurt and guilt and it makes her feel horrible knowing she is the cause. Athena almost wants to take back everything she just said. Hide it within herself and go back to being tentative acquaintances. But then she thinks of Caroline. How hurt she was.

"Just...I- I should get going."

This woman.

Athena.

Stefan couldn't bring himself to draw back from the line that was so clearly drawn between them. And in those honey- gold eyes he could see the thoughts swirling in them as if they were smoke under glass. The cunning mind at work beneath that face- the one he hadn't been able to get out of his head since the first time he saw her.

So he just...moved.

Every instinct in his body came roaring to the surface, so violent he had to choke them with a brutal grip or else he'd find himself on his knees begging for her touch, for anything.

But he leaned in, and grazed the tip of his nose along the side of her neck.

Soft-her skin was so soft; so fragile. He could scent blood rushing just beneath her skin. Stefan breathed the smell of her into his lungs, stirring his cock.

Athena. Athena. Athena.

"Stefan?!" She murmured, "What are you doing?"

"I have no idea."

He doesn't think he's said anything so honest in a while.

* * *

She's running.

It's 2am, late and boring and she can't sleep so she runs.

She runs until all of her muscles burn and her vision blurs and then she goes back home.

She's exhausted and grateful, because at least she's feeling something.

* * *

"Come on, you and Elena can't avoid each other forever," Bonnie says lightly, pulling the other brown girl closer, linking their pinkies together.

And Athena just sighs, he gold eyes darkening. "You aren't going to let this go...are you?"

The grin that moves up on Bonnie's face is pure mischief. "Nope."

* * *

"So then what?" Caroline says with a hum, practically buzzing with excitement. Athena faintly wonders if Elena can even tell that it's false.

"So then, nothing."

The Gilbert girl casts a wary glance in Athena's direction, but offers no other reaction to her presence.

"You and Stefan talked all night. There was no sloppy first kiss, or touchy-feely of any kind?"

A laugh bubbled out of Athena.

"Nope, we didn't go there.

"Not even a handshake? I mean, Elena, we are your friends. Okay? You are supposed to share the smut."

"I object," Athena raises her hand, but Caroline smacks it back down, leaving the other girl pouting.

"We just talked for hours."

Romantic.

Boring. But romantic.

"What is with the blockage? Just jump his bones already. Okay, it's easy. Boy likes girl, girl likes boy, sex."

"Profound," Bonnie mutters, shaking her head.

And then Elena gets up, swallowing a huge breath of air.

"Where are you going?" Bonnie says, throwing her head back to see the other girls eyes.

"Caroline's right. It is easy. If I sit here long enough, I'll end up talking myself out of it instead of doing what I started the day saying I was going to do."

Caroline and even Bonnie look mildly impressed, whereas Athena just plays with her french fries.

"You should let Athena give you a ride."

"What?" Athena and Elena say at the same time. Both girls glancing at each other before looking at Caroline.

"You two need to talk anyway." Bonnie claims and Caroline nods in pure agreement, matching smiles painted on their lips.

"Umm I mean sure I guess." Athena says ungracefully. Practically stumbling out of her chair when Caroline pushes her forward.

The drive is taken in moderate silence, neither girl really knowing how to bring up the conversation that apparently needs to happen. Music plays, low and barely a whisper of sound, until Elena asks "How do you know where Stefan lives?"

"His last name is Salvatore." Athena answers bluntly. "Salvatore boarding house..."

"Oh," Elena mutter back.

"Yeah."

There is no more conversation after that.

* * *

"No one's answering."

"Then maybe we should leave-" Elena opnes the door and walks right in. "Or we could just enter someone else's property when they may or may not be home. That works too," Athena mutters sarcastically already annoyed with the other girl.

"_White people I swear_," she whispers under her breath.

"Stefan?" Elena calls out. "Stefan?" Going deeper and deeper into the house. Athena reluctantly follows behind her. If the cops get called she's 100% blaming Elena.

Damom slides into view, a smug smirk darkening his handsome features, as he looks between Athena and Elena.

"I'm sorry for barging in. The door was open."

"You must be Elena, and it's a pleasure to see you again, _Athena_. I'm Damon. Stefan's brother."

Elena's eyes go wide. "You two know each other."

A low laugh makes it's way out of Athena's mouth, drawing herself closer towards the window. "You could say that," she casually throws over her shoulder.

Damon's eyes dip appreciatively over Athena's form, every step she takes away causes her hips to sway in the most enticing manner.

He licks his lips.

Elena feels a rouge sense of uncomfortableness drip inside of her, drawing Damon's attention back to herself as she says, "He didn't tell me he had a brother."

"Well, Stefan's not one to brag."

"And you've know him for like two days," Athena throws in. She's touching things. Aligning corners of items so they match. Her hair is pulled back in a high ponytail, leaving her long curls dancing behind her every time her head moves in the slightest way.

Damon let's out a short bark of laughter whereas Elena just glares.

"Please. Come. I'm sure Stefan will be along any second."

_As fast as vampire speed can take him._

Athena watches the almost predatory way Damon's eyes jump to Elena's neck. Hungry and deadly. Does she even see she's the prey?

"Wow. This is your living room?"

"Living room, parlor, sotheby's auction. It's a little kitschy for my taste." Athena rolls her eyes and tries to tone them out. "I see why my brother's so smitten. It's about time. I never thought he'd get over the last one. Nearly destroyed him."

Is he really instigating a pissing contest with Stefan? At his big age? _Couldn't be me_, Athena thinks lightly. She finds the nearests chair and plops down, her legs already burning from all the standing and walking.

"The last one?"

"Yeah. Katherine. His girlfriend? Oh, you two haven't had the awkward exes conversation yet." Damon prods, his eyes practically gleaming with chaos. Elena has to be blind to not see what he's trying to do.

"Nope," Elena says, glancing towards Athena who's picking at her nails.

"Oops," Damon lets out with mock care. "Well, I'm sure it'll come up now. Maybe he didn't tell you because he didn't want you to think he was on the rebound. We all know how those relationships end."

"You say it like every relationship is doomed to end."

"I'm a fatalist."

"Or just annoying," Athena comments bluntly. Damon Salvatore reminds her of an obnoxious, hyperactive toddler with a potty mouth.

It's just an accident waiting to happen.

Stefan knows it the second he enters the boarding house and hears both Elena and Athena. In his mind he registers how much a hazard it's going to be as he descends the stairs at a slow and measured pace.

Elena has ignorance as an excuse.

Athena already knows how Stefan feels about her being around Damon.

"Hello, Stefan," Damon calls first, smug and burning.

"Athena," Stefan starts before letting his eyes land on the Gilbert girl. "and Elena."

It's such an odd thing really.

Nobody seems to have noticed, and, if they have, nobody is commenting.

It's okay.

It's just, well, the person he was worried about was Athena. Not Elena. Not the girl he should be worried about.

That's - that's not okay, right?

She should have been the first person on his mind. She should have been the person whose name he called out. She should have been the person he wanted to warn about the danger.

And, yet, she wasn't.

Elena wasn't any of those things, and that's -

Whoa.

Stefan knows he shouldn't, but he still looks at Athena, who is resting with her feet up. Practically sunken into the chair. She tries to have her feet reach the coffee table, but she's too short and they just fall to the floor adorably, as if Stefan hadn't-

Hadn't what?

Panicked at the sheer thought of Athena getting hurt? Almost wanted to shove her out of the house and take her somewhere she can always be safe?

Stefan takes a deep, calming breath, and then forces himself to look away from Athena. It doesn't work in the slightest of ways. Athena's eyes are concerned, and her lips are parted, as if she wants to ask a question. For a moment, Stefan is lost.

So, so lost.

Oh.

Everything suddenly makes so much sense. It's amazing how he didn't see it before. He called out Athena's name for a reason, and, now, he's staring this girl in the face, and everything is falling into place.

Okay.

"I didn't know either of you were coming over."

"I know, I should have called -" Elena hasn't seemed to notice his momentary loss in focus.

"Oh. Don't be silly. You're welcome any time. Isn't she, Stefan? I should break out the family photo albums or some home movies. But I have to warn you he wasn't always such a looker."

"I bet you weren't either," Athena snarks, all dangerous with glowing eyes.

"I can't say there's ever been a time I wasn't this- perfect," Damon moves until he stands right in front of the chair Athena sits on, forcing her to look up at him. "I'm sure you're the same way."

"Awe, Damon," Athena coos, a wickedly amused smile on, "Are you calling me perfect?"

Stefan decidedly does not like that. At all.

"Thank you for stopping by, Athena and Elena. It was nice to see you two."

"Yeah, I guess we should probably go." Stepping back Elena looks ready to run away, her eyes darting between Athena and Damon and Athena and Stefan. Looking confused and hurt. "It was nice to meet you, Damon."

"Great meeting you too, Elena." And Damon offers down his hand to Athena. She rolls her eyes and takes it not expecting herself to be pulled hard enough until she is flush against the eldest Salvatore brother's chest. "Sorry about that, Athena. Guess I don't know my own strength."

He holds her against him for just a moment. She is warm and curvy and her scent is filling his head.

And that's when it happened.

Damon's smirk faded into a smile, faint and soft, and his eyes seemed to hone in on Athena's, and his head tilted down towards the girl and his lips- twitched. Just a tiny twitch.

See, Stefan knew that face. That was the face Damon had made dozens- no, hundreds- of times, over the years, in his presence. It was the face he made right before he kissed someone.

And he was making it at Athena.

She scoffs pushing him away. "I'm sure that's true."

* * *

"Whew," Damon said mockingly. "Great girls. Just _absolutely_ fascinating."

Stefan digs his teeth into his bottom lips and resists the urge to growl.

"You on the other hand look exhausted," Dampn huffs a laugh. "Did someone overexert themselves today? Let me guess the hospital."

Stefan pushes his hands into his pockets to keep from strangling his brother. "Someone had to clean up your mess."

"Well, were you successful," Damon taunts, the scent of Athena on his skin. "Did your powers of persuasion work. If you don't feed properly none of our little tricks work right."

"How long was Athena and Elena here."

Damon stalked over to the in-home bar, slow steady steps. Taking his time pouring himself a drink. "You know I thought it was just Elena who caught your attention."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't you, Stefan?" Damon says after a hearty gulp. "I mean I'm sure initially it was Elena and then you saw Athena and then it all changed. Because damn, that girl is something. Isn't she? I could hardly even see Elena with Athena standing right there."

Stefan feels his stomach curl and his body shake as the veins rise up beneath his skin.

"Is that why you insist on playing this game?" Damon steps froward. "Pretending that you are just this normal high-schooler."

"I'm not playing any games," he thinks of Athena, of the way her eyes caught the light. The way she seemed to affect everything he thought he knew about himself.

"Relax Stefan," the image of Athena and Elena crossing Damon's mind. "We both know the closest you'll ever get to humanity is when you rip it open and feed on it."

"What kind of game are you playing, Damon."

The eldest Salvatore just smirks, that familiar, irritating smirk.

"Guess you'll have to wait and see."

* * *


	3. chapter 3

Athena is floating.

The water is cloudy and warm and fills the air with tall, thin pillars of steam.

Closing her eyes she lets her mind drift, touching her face with pruned fingers, tracing the shape of her chapped lips, her jaw, the soft skin beneath her eyes.

With her eyes closed she can imagine that this is a different bath from the one she tried to kill herself in. With her eyes closed she can imagine the touch of another.

Athena floats and drifts.

Until it shatters.

The water is cold and the room is dark.

She is alone. No matter how much she wants her fantasy to be real, the tender touch on her cheek only ever belonged to her. And the frustration builds and builds until she wants to scream, but she doesn't.

After rubbing herself dry, she puts her sleep clothes on and slips outside to her new home. And even with the blankets pulled up all the way to her chin she is shivering, and the bone deep ache dosen't go away.

She thinks about drinking. She thinks about crying or screaming or hurting herself, just to release that pressure, but that's not the way she broke, and she's trying to avoid self-destruction.

Wrapping the blankets snug around her body, Athena goes to sleep, hopes for vast nothingness.

* * *

"So are you and Stefan actually together, now?" Bonnie asks, practically inhaling her smoothie.

Elena shurgs her shoulders. "He came over after I met his brother...to talk, and explain I guess...It's just, he was kind of hesitant." The brunette drops her head. "I kept thinking he was going to ask but he just left after we talked."

Bonnie lifts her brows looking surprised. She was expecting Elena and Stefan to already be a thing, hell the entire school was. "Maybe he's just taking things slow. You did say he had ex-girlfriend issues."

"Yeah, I know," Elena mutters. "It's just, he makes me feel so much better. And I know initially I was afraid to start anything but the idea of not being with Stefan, hurts."

Bonnie sighs, as they watch Caroline link arms with Athena as they walk into the school. The two of them sharing a secret smile.

Elena growls out a sound from deep within her throat, her eyes going unusally dark. "And he asked me about Athena. A lot."

"You think he likes her?" Bonnie tilts her head considering, because it would honestly make sense. Athena had always been unfairly pretty.

"I'm not sure. I hope not." Elena whispers honestly. "I wouldn't wish the kind of baggage Athena brings behind her on anyone."

That causes Bonnie to come up short. "That isn't fair and you know it. She can't help that she hurts the way she does."

"That's not what I meant, Bonnie," Elena winces slightly. "I just meant that she's a lot, and she could do something like what she did again, at any time. It's by pure luck that she's alive right now and that's a lot of pressure for anyone."

Shaking her head, the Bennett girl stares at her best friend. "Look, I haven't even seen Stefan and Athena talk before. He's probably just curious to know what really happened."

"Yeah," Elena mutters even though something in her head is warning her otherwise.

* * *

Athena has always been alone. It's not what she wanted but she can't change it. She has suffered enough awkward attempts at intimacy to last her lifetime. It's better this way, she reasons.

There are days...

Days when she comes home to nothing, where there's a scream locked in her throat and she's stuck in a perpetual freefall. Days where she longs for the comforting bustle of another person, and more importantly, the touch of another. Skin to skin contact.

She has thick soft blankets that weigh her down, almost like another draped on top of her. On particularly bad days she has baths. So warm and sweet smelling.

Still these are all temporary reliefs.

There are times when Athena lies awake and she wants to go out and find someone to touch her. To make her feel real and not like a ghost. But she knows it wouldn't end well.

So she stays home.

She stays alone.

* * *

It's when Bonnie's walking to class that it happens. She hadn't meant to touch Stefan, to bump into him. But she had and no matter what she does, her shoulder feels cold.

Dread makes her head hurt.

And when she tells Elena the girl makes plans for a dinner...for her and Stefan to soothe out their differences.

Bonnie can't fight the feeling that it isn't just their differences making this whole thing difficult.

* * *

"Come on Stefan our football team could use someone like you," Elena whispers, except her voice is much to loud if it reaches all the way to Athena. The girl nearly rolls her eyes, she can't focus if all she can hear is their conversation.

And wasn't that just a dreadfully polite way of saying the football team was trash.

And football really?

She only watched a bunch of helmet-wearing meatheads smash their last two braincells out of existence because she was a cheerleader and therefore required to be there.

At least the cheer squad had talent- certainly more than that collection of neanderthals that they were ostensibly there to support.

"Can't," Stefan says with a smirk. "I'm a loner."

"Ms. Gilbert," Tanner interrupts looking rather excited at having caught her in the middle of a conversation. "When did pearl harbor start?"

"December 7th, 1941." Athena mutters under her breath, only loud enough for herself to really hear.

And she does this thing.

So subtle no one else would notice.

It starts with the slow tapping of fingers.

Stefan's hearing is impeccable, which is why he hears it. Fingers tapping on a tan thigh, a steady rhythm that lasts for exactly three minutes and fourteen seconds.

Like clockwork.

Without fail.

Then comes the eyes.

Athena's eyes shift from left to right every few minutes, as if she's trying her level best to stay seated; not to fidget or bolt.

To stay.

But, the biggest thing - at least to Stefan's eye - is the way Athena Medici looks at him. It's almost as if she's asking a question she can't voice, searching for an answer neither of them can handle. As much as it puts Stefan on edge, it intrigues him. Athena is almost pleading with him, her eyes begging for something her mouth won't say.

"December 7th, 1941," Stefan says loud enough for the whole class to hear. His eyes finding their way back to Athena. Per usual.

The girl has her hair in a high ponytail, and with her hand resting on her right chin, her hair falls over her right shoulder. Showing a tattoo of some sort, located directly on the back of her neck.

"Than you, Miss Gilbert," Tanner says rudely.

"Anytime," the Salvatore mutters back more than a little distracted. If she would only tilt her head to the right just a little more he would be able to see-

"The fall of the Berlin wall?"

"1989." Stefan looks up at the teacher, he hates authority figures like this. The one's who try and undermine their students to feel better about themselves. "I'm good with dates."

"Are you? Keep up then. Civil rights act?"

"1964."

"John F. Kennedy's assasination."

"1963."

"Martin luther king."

"68."

"Lincoln."

"1685."

"Roe v. Wade."

"1973."

"Brown v. Board."

"1954."

"The battle of Gettysburg."

"1863."

"Korean war?"

"1950 to 1953."

"Ha," Tanner lets out. Standing up straight so his body looms over the entire class. "It ended in 1952."

"Actually sir," Athena raises her head, and all of the class immediately tune into the girl. She taps her penicl against her desk, once. Twice. "It ended in '53."

"Somebody look it up," Tanner's eyes rolling over the class, his expression thunderous.

"It was 1953," some student in the back corner says.

The class erupts into laughter until Tanner glares them into silence.

After class Stefan can't help but follow after Athena, it's starting to become a habit.

Him chasing her down.

"Yes, Stefan," Athena says without turning around, sighing out his name.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing...after Damon. I never got to catch up with you-"

"Hey Stefan," Elena interrupts coming up behind him and touching his arm. "How did you know all of that."

"He likes to show off," Athena says unabashed in her sincerity. Looking the Salvatore up and down. She gestured ironically, a quirk to her brow and mouth. It was strange how she could flit from a feeling prowling on the edge of threatening, to light hearted, humored wit. Admirable, in fact.

"Actually," Stefan corrects with his own grin. "It was years and years of crossword puzzels. It's a loner thing."

Athena laughs at that.

"Likely excuse."

She's walking away again and Stefan wants to say more, but it feels dangerous; a teetering ledge where their friendship balances, swaying between intimacy and detachment.

* * *

"I don't like it."

Bonnie's gaze drifts away from the scene playing out in front of her to the girl who's spoken and, somewhat rudely, broken into her thoughts.

Elena Gilbert is scowling, her expression twisted into one of confusion and disdain.

"I don't like it one bit," she reiterates, and Bonnie sighs. She doesn't want to be having this conversation at all, but Elena seems determined. "I mean, look at them."

Bonnie has been looking.

It's the entire reason she initially chose this spot - it gives her a prime view of the two people she can't seem to stop looking at - and Elena just had to sit beside her. She's definitely less conspicuous than she is with her staring, and Bonnie doesn't want to have to explain her interest in getting to the bottom of why Caroline and Athena have decided to launch a school club together.

Of course, she panicked when she first heard the rumours, thinking the two of them were up to something nefarious.

It's much worse, in fact.

They're starting a classical music club and the very idea of it has just broken Bonnie's brain. Caroline Forbes, Head Cheerleader, National students honor society President and - as far as Bonnie knows - not at all interested in classical music.

This must be some joke.

"I don't like it," Elena says again, shaking her head. "She's up to something. Athena is always up to something."

Admittedly, Bonnie may be inclined to agree with her. It's unlike Athena to participate in anything.

Even other students seem wary of it, because Athena has really started their junior year with a bang. Really, shes in better shape than she's ever been and definetly not afraid to flaunt her new body.

The dresses she's always been known for wearing aren't exactly gone, but her wardrobe now includes some of the tightest jeans and signature long sleeves. She wears more vibrant colours, while carrying her patent elegance - how she manages that is beyond Bonnie, truly. Her hair is left longer than it's ever been, and it definitely suits her.

It makes her appear older, somewhat worldly.

But that's just her outward appearance. She's... softer now, almost reverent.

She smiles more, talks to everyone, and even signed up at the Tutor Centre. It's not surprising that that resulted in an influx of students who suddenly wanted to be tutored. Athena doesn't even look affected by all the attention she's receiving. It's almost as if she's immune to it somehow.

Or… she's just planning something.

"Somebody has to say something," Elena grumbles at Bonnie's side. "I mean, this is Athena we're talking about. She doesn't care about classical music."

Bonnie wonders if that's true. "She's taken piano lessons since she was a kid," she says, finding herself defending Athena almost automatically, even if she's just stating a fact. "And dance lessons, and vocal lessons, and basically all types of lessons her parents could put her in."

Everything in Athena's life was worked for. Her singing voice was the result of relentless vocal training, her dancing was perfected after attending five classes a week for the past ten years, her grades reflected the hours she spent studying.

She had earned every solo, every lead role, and every academic award she had ever achieved.

And now she was forever moving, tapping, running, gliding through life.

Actually _living_ life however...that was what she struggled with.

Stefan slides up to the two girls, smiling that nice gentle smile. He doesn't interrupt the conversation, though his prescense does halt it, as him and Elena share that romantic movie stare.

"Oh, please," when Elena regains herself dismisses with a scoff. "As if she even cares about the piano. Athena doesn't care about anyone but herself."

That causes even Bonnie to flinch. And from the look on Stefan's face he doesn't appreciate that comment either.

Stefan bristles, turning his gaze on her. "That's not a very nice thing to say, Elena," he says, glaring heatedly. "She is your friend."

"Was." Elena corrects, frowning.

With the way Athena is talking animatedly and taking notes; it's clear she's the driving force behind the initiative, which just confuses Bonnie even further.

"I don't like it," Elena says again, folding her arms over her chest. "For all we know, this could be some elaborate ruse to humiliate Caroline."

"What?" Stefan says with an unbelieving laugh.

He just doesn't want people to be talking about Athena the way they are. It has nothing to do with his sudden and inexplicable desire to _protect_ Athena. Anything the poor girl does just gets amplified and criticised, and it bothers Stefan that she can't just be.

Hasn't she been through enough? Doesn't she deserve some peace?

"You don't know the old Athena," Elena mutters. "She used to be so cold and ruthless."

And perhaps the old Athena could of been capable of that. She had been an ice queen back then. But, then again, this Athena is... different. More present; more involved. It's disarming and terrifying and still so very wonderful.

And then Athena lifts her head feeling their gazes, awkwardly she waves with a small smile before directing all of her attention back to Caroline.

Bonnie just doesn't get Elena reservations because as far as she can see, Athena is getting better.

Or maybe, she's getting better at convincing others she's okay.

But she does look happy.

Simling bright and freely.

Although Bonnie can't fight the sickly feeling that Athena's smile... It's a little disconcerting, but it makes the Bennett feel…odd. A bad odd. She can't shake the feeling that Athena's smiles carry more meaning.

The lunch period isn't over when Caroline and Athena leave.

Chatting to each other with bent heads and excited smiles on their faces. Stefan watches them go, feeling jealousy, though he can't figure out exactly why or even at whom it's directed.

"Oh come on, Bonnie. Be realistic here. I know a lot of things changed for Athena this summer...but she's still pretty manipulative when she wants to be."

Stefan looks completely upset with the way this conversation is heading. "When people want to hide something they have to learn how to twist the truth to their benefit. I don't think she was intentionally trying to be manipulative back then...I mean I didn't know her, but it seems to me that Athena was just trying to protect herself."

Elena's eyes go wide and a frown furrows her brow, she's used to being believed at face value.

"I agree," Bonnie mutters quietly. "Maybe she's just changing. She doesn't get as riled up when people insult her anymore. She's letting lower classmen borrow her old, rather detailed notes for past classes. She's stopped going to church, completely. She even joined the calligraphy club." Bonnie pauses at that. "Caligraphy."

"And the photography club," Elena adds. "And Red Cross, and the Model United Nations and the cultural diversity club and the fine reading book club and mathletes and cross country and the historical society club."

Stefan just shurgs his shoulders because that is a lot, even for him. But his mind can't help but wonder if it's all just...distraction. If Athena Medici can't not be doing something, because then she would have to stop and think. And maybe thinking for her is a nightmare.

That very idea makes his stomach hurt.

"Maybe we are making this more complicated then it has to be," Bonnie mutters. "Athena has always been academically focused, I wouldn't be surprised if all this wasn't preparation for college applications."

Maybe.

Stefan still feels as if he is missing something.

He's lived a long time and had always been able to get a good read on others...but it seems like as soon as he gets closer to understanding Athena she switches up and shows a completely different part of her personality.

* * *

Without even realizing it Stefan's opinion on Athena changes.

Everything he thinks he knows, he probably doesn't. In the beginning he thought he could see something he recognized in her eyes. Now he knows better.

Athena is different.

* * *

Elena doesn't know why she went out of her way to invite Athena over to the dinner with Bonnie and Stefan...but she just needs to see, see Stefan and her together.

See them interact.

* * *

"Shut the fuck up already, Tikina," she called out drawing snickers from the other girls, all while appearing somehow between murderous and disinterested.

"My name is Tiki," the girl scowled at Athena, adjusting her ponytail and stomping her foot, looking all the angry toddler she was.

And her sickeningly insincere smile in response made the other girl's vision narrow and blood boil. A predictable reaction.

"Where the hell is Caroline?" Athena growls out irritated. Her lips pressed into a line. "I'm tired of being the head bitch. Jesus, Bonnie you take over. I'm not diplomatic enough."

"You really aren't. All you do is glare people into submission and boss everyone around," swirling her head towards the other girl, Bonnie laughs. "You were the one who wanted to be co-captain, though."

"To hang out with Caroline," Athena insists.

"I'll try calling her again," Bonnie mutters loosely, pulling out her phone as Athena growls out some harsh words to the group of complaining girls.

"Sorry ladies," Caroline slides up, pompous smirk in full effect. Gliding past Elena and throwing out sharply, "I got the other brother. Hope you don't mind."

Athena rolls her eyes.

As Elena stares after her.

Really, ladies? A catfight.

Athena rolls her eyes again hoping they really would just roll right out of her head, walking towards the eldest Salvatore brother.

"Uhm," Caroline calls after the girl, "Where are you going?"

"He needs to know you aren't allowed to be late for practice." Athena shoots over her shoulder. "Since you two decided to make your lateness so apparent, afterall..." she trails off, with all the airness of a royal.

Damon takes in her slow stride towards him with a smirk.

He enjoys watching the girl.

There is an anxious sort of agression to her, reminding Damon of animals trapped in a zoo.

Fighting the urge to lick his lips as he takes her fully in. Athena Medici was not traditionally thin. She wasn't like Elena or Caroline or Bonnie who all were rather thin and petite all together, this girl had curves. Wide hips and legs that spoke of strength. Her body spoke of inherent care by the way her muscles moved beneath her skin.

And those shorts.

He can't help but he a little confused on how someone so short has such long legs. It doesn't make any sense, really. Aren't there physic lessons or something on all the ways that should be impossible?

She was...simply put a beautfiul woman.

"Damon," she drawled, stoping just in front of him with amused eyes.

"Athena," he replied in kind.

"Did you forget that Caroline was on my list?" The girl tilted her head with an uncharacteristicly sweet smile on her face.

"Don't worry, sweetheart," The eldest Salvatore said with a wink. "I didn't do anything she didn't absolutely...delight in."

"That's very generous of you," Athena replied. "Keep it that way."

Turning on her heel she bounces back to where she came from, the natural sway from every step she takes taking his attention.

"And Salvatore," she calls causing all the other cheerleaders to stare at her. "If Caroline is late again I will be blaming you."

He chuckles at that meancing tone she adds even though it was truly about as threatening as a butterfly.

He stays just to watch them begin, he sees Elena get sent to the back and...his jaw nearly drops, because nothing could of prepared him for the way Athena moves her body.

She was a natural born dancer.

Because really that's what cheerleading is. A mixture of dance and gymnastics.

Talent was talent, and Athena Medici must had been doing perfectly balanced cartwheels since she could walk, with back flips and the ability to fold herself into a pretzel following shortly after. She worked her ass off to stay in shape, and she commanded the other girls with the kind of natural charisma of someone who was born to take charge of a room.

She had the most ridiculous strength to weight ratio and therefore could alternate between flyer and base with ease.

No wonder Stefan was so distracted from Elena.

* * *

With no real reason as to why, after practice, Stefan goes to the auditorium.

He knows Elena wants to talk to him about something, and he has a feeling he knows what it is...he just doesn't necessarily have an answer for her yet. He had been so sure before and now...It's complicated.

He needs a place that's deserted to get a handle on his feelings towards Elena. Towards Athena.

What he doesn't expect is to find Athena casually playing a complicated Bach piece at the piano.

Stefan doesn't announce his presence immediately, choosing rather to hang back and listen. He even chuckles to himself when Athena makes a mistake and mutters 'Fudgesticks' instead of a curse word.

Her form is almost perfect, back straight and her wrists lifted. Athena's fingers practically float over the keys, dancing reverently, and it's suddenly obvious she's well-trained. Stefan can't help finding everything about Athena Medici in this moment simply endearing.

When she gets to what must be the end of the piece, she runs her hands through her long hair and sighs heavily, as if she isn't at all impressed with what she's just played.

"You're really good," Stefan says, breaking into the eerie silence.

Athena whips her head around, almost sliding off the piano bench in her surprise. "Salvatore," she squeaks, hand over her heart. "You scared me."

"Sorry," he says, even though there's a part of him that isn't really. He quite likes the deer-in-headlights look of Athena Medici. "But you are, you know? Good, I mean. I didn't know you were so well trained."

Athena shurgs, absently tapping a rhythm with her fingers on her denim-clad thigh. "It was a requirement of my family."

Stefan nods in understanding as he makes his way towards the stage. He has a vague idea about Athena's family life, but he can't actively recall the brunette actually talking about it or them or even other parts of her childhood.

"I learned only the basics," Stefan says, climbing the steps to be on the same level as Athena. "I suck at scales."

Her face spreads into a smile, and it's probably one of the most genuine smiles Stefan has ever seen her wear.

It's also a little heartbreaking that it's taken her seventeen years to allow herself just to just be.

"I hate scales," Athena says, a guilty smile on her lips. "I think most people do, to be honest. And, those who say they don't are just liars."

Stefan walks towards her, just wanting to be closer. There's something magnetic about Athena, attracting all sorts of people.

"Do you mind if I sit with you?" he asks.

Her smile slips for only a beat. It's as if she's psyching herself up for her response. "It's a free country."

Stefan tilts his head. "That's probably the one reason it's so cruel."

Athena looks thoughtful and maybe even pleasantly surprised. "Freedom of speech?"

"There's no stipulation against hate speech, particularly when it's so easy to remain anonymous."

Athena seems to mull over that. "No, I suppose there isn't," and then shes, shifting on the bench to make space for Stefan. "Maybe we can play something together," she offers.

Stefan absolutely loves the sound of that idea, and practically skips (though he would deny it) the last few steps before settling beside Athena. Only their knees touch, but Stefan can't shake the notion that he can feel the girl everywhere. She's very warm, radiating heat. "What should we play?"

Athena visibly thinks, the tip of her tongue absently poking out of her mouth in a way that he finds wonderfully adorable. "What about Emeli Sande's Next To Me?" she finally suggests.

Stefan takes a moment to recall the song, and then nods enthusiastically. Even as Athena begins to play, the Salvatore knows there's something inherently important about this moment.

It's as if it's a beginning.

For Athena, for Stefan; for them both.

He can't be sure why or how, but this girl, he's sure, is the real one.

And, she's beautiful.

Afterwards when he asks Athena if she had any plans and she says Elena invited her over for a dinner of some sort, he doesn't hesitate to ask if he could be her ride there.

* * *

Athena: As I'm sure you are aware, there are certain rules regarding your little relationship with Caroline. If you show up and I see bite marks, I'll burn you to the ground, Salvatore.

Damon: How did you even get my number? And what makes you think I'm even trying to go to their get together?

Athena: You're an instigator, you'll be there. And what can I say, I'm resourceful.

Damon: I don't doubt that. You don't like Elena and Elena doesn't like you. Why did she invite you?

Athena: I think I'm fairly neutral when it comes to Elena.

Damon: I know what that means.

Athena: My meaning was clearly stated. Don't read into it.

Damon: I'm reading into it.

Athena: Of course you are.

* * *

Athena doesn't talk much after Damon arrives. She merely sits in a chair in the far corner, looking down at her lap with her arms crossed over her chest. It looks almost like an attempt to hold herself together and every so often her fingers trail down her arm in a slow, absent caress.

It's habitual and practiced, self-soothing.

"Are you cold?" Damon asks, beating Stefan to it, feigning polite concern.

"I'm fine," she says, a touch too quickly. A look of uncertainty clouds her face.

"Caroline here tells me you two are starting a new club," Damon smirks. "How...good of you."

Athena's eyes sharpen, and in an instant the prey like behavior washes away. She's a predator now. "I'm glad you think so, because you know, I hold your opinion in such high esteem."

He couldn't tell if it was superiority in her voice or the backhanded comment that would be more infuriating.

"You know, Medici, you should be careful how you treat people. It would be a pity to waste that pretty little voice of yours on such a regrettable personality."

Athena's expression hardened, her hazel-gold eyes shining with a dangerous magnetism. "Your one to talk about a regrettable personality, especially considering your dating a high-schooler. What's the matter D, couldn't find someone your own age?"

And there is a bluntness to her, between the comfortable flow of regular conversation about Stefan joining the football team, and Elena quitting cheer, everyone seems to forget Athena is even here.

And Damon should be annoyed, hell he should be even a little angry. Instead hes amused.

"Upset I didn't choose you."

She scoffs," You wish you could even aim in my direction," she snarls back, all sharp eyes and edges.

And then Elena is coughing, and the eye-contact between Damon and Athena is broken, as if it never was.

Athena stands after that. "Thank you for the invite, Elena, you've been a lovely host," her voice is polite, customer-service like friendly, almost generic. "But I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave early."

Elena smiles warmly, "That's fine."

Stefan stands as well. And Elena's smile dims again.

"Where are you going?"

"I gave Athena a ride here."

And the dark look that reminds him of Katheirne is back in Elena's eyes.

"And I can walk home," Athena says absently. Already making her way towards the door.

Damon has another mask of false concern on. "But it's late and and anything could happen."

"How terrifying," Athena says shortly.

"I'll take you home," Damon offers.

"No," Stefan snaps. "Athena doesn't need to be bothered by you, Damon."

"Athena would rather have me take her where she needs to go than you, Stefan."

"Uh guys," Caroline says quietly, honestly too amused that her boyfriend or whatever Damon is to her wants Athena. Because she would gladly take a step back for that girl. "Athena already left."

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

What no one was expecting was for Elena Gilbert to follow right after Athena.

"Why are you-"

"For you," Elena says simply. "Because I can see what is really going on."

Athena seems to sink into the shadows behind her, as if her legs have just given out. "You do?" She sounds breathless, surprised and frightened.

"I do," Elena says soothingly. "And I want you to know this is a safe space to talk about things." For a moment, Athena looks relieved, which quickly disappears when Elena keeps speaking. "So, there's no need to keep up with whatever you have planned."

Athena's previously relaxed expression gives way to a confused frown. "Wait, what?"

"I know what's going on," Elena repeats, and her gold eyes turn on her, still clouded with confusion.

"Do you really?" she asks, hesitant. "Because you're not exactly reacting the way I thought you would. And, how on earth did you find out, anyway?"

"You aren't as good as hiding as you like to think you are," Elena says, a little smug.

For a moment Athena's eyes flash with something dark and Elena's smirk falters.

"I don't think-"

"You need to stop," the Gilbert girl snaps harshly. "You need to leave Caroline alone and stop dragging her into your issues. It's what you do, isn't it? Manipulate and hurt people. Because I remember last year, I remember what kind of person you are even if everyone else would rather forget."

"Is-is that what you think I'm hiding, is that what you all think?" Her voice was abnormally small, and then the tapping against her thigh started again. She looked behind Elena at Bonnie, Caroline, Stefan, and Damon.

"Come on, Athena," Elena says. "You have to admit your sudden interest in all this other shit is a little weird. What else are we supposed to think?"

"What else are you supposed to think?" she echoes softly, sounding like a child. "This is why you wanted me here, then?" She looks at Stefan, the man who brought her. Her eyes harden. She won't make that mistake again.

And she just stares.

The reaction they expect doesn't come.

She just adjusts her jaw, her eyes darkening as she works through everything that's been said.

They're all just waiting.

Waiting.

Her hackles don't rise, she doesn't deny anything and she definitely doesn't lash out.

In fact, she says nothing for the longest time, just looking at each of them in turn

"I see," Athena eventually says as she gracefully straightens and, for the first time this year, the group is awarded with the cold exterior they came to expect from the Athena Medici of old.

It sends a ripple of anxiety through all of them.

And, suddenly, Stefan knows they've been wrong about their assumptions from the very beginning, because it's in this moment Stefan realises Athena isn't calm at all.

Not even close.

She's a ticking time-bomb just waiting to go off.

Caroline steps forward as well. "Athena," she whispers, sounding defeated.

"It's okay, Care," she says, her expression dangerously passive. "They were just looking out for you. I can't fault them that. I mean, I am a raging bitch most of the time, cruel and calculating and manipulative. It's expected that they'd be wary."

"Athena," she says again, stepping towards her.

She steps back, shaking her head. "I - I tried, you know," she whispers.

"I know," she says, stepping towards her, only for her to move away again. "Athena, please."

"I'm sorry to disappoint you all, but there's nothing sinister going on here. I'm actually more insulted for Caroline; that you would think I would need some ruse to want to hurt her when she- God. For the first time in my life, I'm doing things for myself and I had no idea it bothered you all so much that I was finally being nice; that I was finally figuring out how to be happy. But, no worries, all right? You no longer need to worry about that."

It's a thinly-veiled threat but Stefan knows exactly what she's saying without her actually saying the words.

Athena looks at Caroline, smiling sadly. "See you tomorrow?"

"Of course," she chokes out, wanting desperately to make this all better but unsure how to do that.

She doesn't say anything else as she spins on her heel and leaves towards the darkness without once looking back.

When Athena is out of sight, Caroline rounds on them, looking accusatory and hurt. "Seriously?" she shrieks. "Are you actually kidding me right now? Whose stupid idea was this?"

Trust Elena not to own up to her stupid idea.

"You guys have no idea what you've done," she says hauntingly. "You have no idea." With that, she stalks out towards the sidewalk walking the opposite way home.

Damon just stares after Athena. That broken girl, in so many ways ruined. And then he looks at Elena. Elena Gilbert has known pain, no one can question that, but she doesn't understand Athena. So she hurts her.

Elena reminds him of a naive and absentminded toddler.

And by looking at Stefan's face, the other Salvatore brother agrees.

* * *

Damon doesn't know why he went to the Medici mansion.

Doesn't even consider it a bad idea until he rings the doorbell.

"Hello," a voice says, and Damon sets eyes on a man he's seen only a handful of times but never actually met.

His upbringing sends Damon forward. "Is Athena here?"

There's a small beat of nothing before recognition hits and the man smiles widely, channelling his niece in some cosmos way. And then the smile dims considerably, but he holds it in place as best as he can. "Actually, no," he says, his brow creasing. "She tore in here a few minutes ago, raced upstairs to change into her running gear, and shot right back out. She's probably running past the park as we speak."

Damon reads his facial expression for what it is. "You look...concerned," he points out.

The man forces a wider smile. "I'm sure it's nothing," he dismisses.

And Damon can nearly feel the lie.

"Will she be gone long?" he asks. "I don't mind waiting."

David Medici regards him carefully, as if he's making a decision about him. "I don't know how long she'll be," he confesses, sounding oddly despondent.

Damon gives a short nod, turns and leaves.

* * *

"I'm not here to apologize," they're the first words to shatter the thick silence lingering in the air. The first words to make Damon's presence known.

They send chills down her spine in a way she can't seem to explain to herself, settling deep in her stomach before her heart drops to its snowy depths. She thinks even the planets hanging above her shiver from the disturbance.

"Are you ever?" She hates the way it rolls off her tongue with a familiar bitterness. One always associated with Damon, and herself, and them. Like an all-encompassing poison she'll never be able to find the cure for. She thinks it's always a cry for help that she strangles before it leaves her mouth, and instead lets it fall out a mangled mess of acid spewed on whoever is unlucky enough to be a witness.

"Sometimes. When I think it needs to be done," and now Damon's moving closer. He's slowly making his way toward his destination, towards her.

She's sweaty from her run, hair sticking to her forehead and her skin glistening over defined muscles.

"Your friends are assholes."

"They aren't my friends."

"Figured as much."

He sits down on one side of the bench, soon enough she sits down too. And somehow Damon's attentive gaze hurts more than anything else.

She looks up at the sky and thinks of Mars. She would like to live there. Seems fun. The God of war after all, and how fitting is that.

The tapping on her thigh starts again.

"Why are you here, then?" She wonders if she'll be able to contribute anything more than questions to this conversation. All of the bite from their encounter in the ealier was drained from her body.

"I don't know. I was hungry, figured you would be easy prey."

Athena just nods in acceptance.

"And I was worried about you, I guess," the words are low and rushed. Like he has to physically push them out of his mouth.

He looks at her.

"Why are you so scared?"

"What?" She's out of breath when it tumbles out of her mouth, nothing more than a wobbly whisper. Nothing like the venomous tone she was trying to conjure.

"Everything you said before it. You tried to sound like a bitch, but you just sounded scared." And Damon almost sounds remorseful, apologetic. Athena's heard almost all of Damon's colourful vocabulary and attitudes, but she's never heard this. Not directed at her at least. Maybe Elena. But not her.

"I'm not scared of you," it's supposed to be denial but if you listen hard enough you can hear the confession behind her trembling voice. It's a lie that leaves a sour taste in both of their mouths. "And it's ridiculous that you think that."

"I know," Damon nods, "I think you're scared of everything else." There's a softness in his eyes that she thinks Elena may have left it there.

And Damon feels...odd.

He doesn't know why he went after her. Doesn't know why he wanted to rip Elena's throat out. Doesn't know why the vampire side of him wants to claim Athena forever when Katherine is waiting for him.

But he can't resent her.

Not for long, anyway.

Athena doesn't mean to let the wetness spill from her eyes, the way her secrets are threatening to spill from her mouth. She's been doing so good at keeping it together but it's like Mystic Falls is just this cesspool of trauma and everything she's spent the last six months trying to separate herself from comes back.

"I was a horrible person." She says it without her voice trembling and it's enough to stop the ground from splitting open and swallowing her whole. "I was always so angry, all the time, no matter how many runs I went on. No matter how many times I played piano, or painted, or did anything. I was just angry. And it came out in bad ways."

Damon doesn't know what to say so he doesn't say anything.

"I was cruel to people too. And manipulative." She leans her head back. "The old me and Katherine could of been twins with how desensitized I was to the people around me."

She laughs, a hollow sound.

"Still am, honestly." She says. "I wouldn't even care if you ripped half this town apart and had it rain blood. Because I only really care about the people I love. Not much else."

"That's not a bad thing."

"You think?"

And yes, she's vicious. She's manipulative and often mean, but she doesn't want to be.

"Yeah."

There's a silence.

"I think you need to drink."

And then Athena laughs, there's still that same old darkness in her eyes, but at least she's smiling.

"As long as it isn't blood, I'm game." She even looks a little michevious when she tilts her head. "Bet I could out drink you."

"Impossible."

The park lights are brash and bright, and Athena isn't particularly fond of how bright it is, exposing her sharp features, sweaty skin, terribly aware of the way Damon's sneaking glances at her.

"I guess we'll see, won't we?"

"I guess we will."

* * *

And they do see.

* * *

If Stefan expects anything to be different about Athena following the confusion that was Friday night; he's severely mistaken. Maybe she is a better actor than he initially gives her credit for, but it's as if nothing is wrong.

Unless, well, you're looking close enough.

There's something in the way Athena won't meet his gaze or even talk directly to him. Refuses to even be alone with him.

It shouldn't hurt him as much as it does.

And it shouldn't be used as an excuse to avoid being with Elena, but it is.

* * *

They clash a lot.

As the days go on.

Stefan says things, and Athena says other things.

Stefan isn't even sure why he pushes so hard.

He knows he isn't the most learned (read: healthy) person when it comes to bottled emotions, but the girl is refusing to talk to anyone about it. It irritates and infuriates him, and that's why he thinks he needles and pokes as much as he does.

Stefan wants to get a rise out of Athena. He wants them to fight and attack and talk. It's not healthy, what Athena's doing, and Stefan isn't sure how he's supposed to help her (why he even wants to help her) when Athena blatantly avoids helping herself.

* * *

When Stefan finally gets any insight on Athena it comes in the form of Caroline.

"You two had another fight today, didn't you?" Caroline slides up to him by the bar, her eyes rather attentive and looking nothing like the airhead blonde he believed her to be.

"What."

She resists the urge to roll her eyes. "You and Athena," she says. "You fought."

"We did."

"Why?"

"It's nothing," he dismisses.

"Oh, I'm sure of that," she says, chuckling. "Most of your fights usually are."

Stefan doesn't respond because he gets the feeling there's something else more important that she wants to discuss with him, so he waits, and he's not disappointed.

"Does - does she talk to you?" she asks, her voice quiet, as if she's worried Athena will somehow hear her.

"What do you mean?"

Caroline straightens her spine, "I know you know what I'm talking about, Stefan," she says. "There's something she's constantly fighting, and she never talks to me about it. All she does is discuss school and other students. She goes on runs all the time, and - " her voice catches. "It's in her eyes, isn't it?"

Stefan's feet dig into the floor, and his chest tighens. "It is, yeah."

"She's deeply unhappy."

"She is, yeah."

Caroline breathes out slowly. "But, when you two fight, she comes alive."

Stefan chuckles darkly. "We do what we have to."

"All I want to do is help her," Caroline says. "I want to make it better but I don't know how to do that when she won't even talk to me."

"She will," Stefan says. "I don't know when or how or why, but she will."

"I just hate to think about what might have to happen again for her to resort to that."

And, well, she's not the only one.

* * *

They are studying at the Salvatore boarding house.

Stefan, Elena, Bonnie, Caroline.

Damon is out, probably compelling college sorority girls, and the only sound is the scrapping of pencils against paper and a question every so often tossed around the group.

When the knock on the door comes, Stefan instantly tenses, and then relaxes when Athena opens the door without waiting for a response. If she's surprised to see all of them on the floor, she doesn't show it. In fact, she grins at Caroline as she moves into the room, her hair slightly damp and her body hidden by sweatpants and a pale blue t-shirt.

She doesn't acknowledge Elena at all.

"Well, aren't you a sight?" she says, dropping onto the carpet on Stefan's left side. "Panicking about tomorrow?"

Caroline shoots her a glare. "Not all of us are AP geniuses," she grumbles, and Athena's grin grows. "Stop that."

Athena chuckles because she can't help it.

"What can I do to help?" she asks, though her eyes remain on only Caroline. She doesn't trust herself to look at Elena or Stefan or even Bonnie, even if she desperately wants to.

Caroline shifts closer but not close enough to make her uncomfortable.

As expected, Athena figures out the problem easily and all of them settle in to complete the paper.

Athena ends up borrowing one of Stefan's mechanical pencils and she keeps it tucked behind her ear whenever she's not using it, hidden in dark locks. Stefan finds himself staring at it a little too often, and he's just glad Elena and Bonnie are too preoccupied with the work they're doing to notice. He wouldn't even know how to explain his observation of the perfect curve of Athena's ear.

* * *

When Athena lets out her first yawn, Stefan has to force himself not to stupidly blurt out how adorable she is. He bites his tongue as the girl stretches, her arms high in the air and her sock-covered toes curling. Stefan could probably stare at her forever.

Bonnie and Elena left about two hours ago, Elena had tried to get him alone but he managed to avoid going. He needed time to think about how to handle her, to lightly let her down.

"Time for bed?" Caroline questions.

Athena's eyes are slightly glassy when she nods her head. It's doubtful she's going to get much sleep, but she's still going to try. "I think so. Any last questions?"

"Just one," Stefan says, sliding his book towards her, he understands already to be truthful, math is a subject that just got easier over the years (for him anyway) but he wanted her to talk to him, because studying and fighting are the only times she focuses all her attention on him.

Athena leans forward, absently resting her elbows on the tops of her thighs... and winces. It's a minimal reaction but Stefan sees it. He sees it and he just knows.

Stefan takes his book back. "Actually, you know what, it's okay," he says. "It's getting late, anyway. If I don't know it by now, it's unlikely I'll figure it out anyway."

Athena chuckles nervously. "Yeah," she says, rising to her feet. "Good luck tomorrow, guys. Goodnight."

"Wait are you walking?" Caroline asks, heading outside.

"Yeah," Athena says quietly. "I've been walking pretty much everywhere lately."

"It's dark," Caroline points out her lips pressed into a line. "I'll give you a ride."

"No," Stefan cuts in. "It'll be faster if I do it. You two live in opposite directions."

Caroline smiles widely, whereas Athena practically jumps at the idea of being alone with him.

"Are you sure-"

"Yes."

Caroline seems to not need anymore convincing because with one final wave she is out the door.

* * *

Stefan takes Athena's hand and walks her to his room. His eyes darkening with every step. Until they are nearly black.

"Stefan-"

He closes the door behind her.

"Are you going to show me, or am I going to have to see for myself?"

Athena's eyes bug out. "What," she squeaks.

"Show me."

"No."

Stefan sighs. "Athena, please."

She shakes her head. "I can't do that. I can't."

"You can," he presses. "It's just me, okay? Let me see. Please."

She closes her eyes as she bites the inside of her cheek until she draws blood. She doesn't give a verbal response; just nods.

Stefan takes the cue and reaches for the waistband of Athena's sweatpants. A tiny part of his brain registers how sexual this could be, but his eyes are laser-focused on seeing what he knows is there. Slowly, he pulls down, and Athena lifts herself up to allow her to slide the pants down.

Even though Stefan knows what's coming, he can't help the gasp he lets out at the sight of darkly bruised skin and ugly red streaks marring the perfect flesh of the uppermost part of her thighs.

Athena keeps her eyes closed, refusing to acknowledge anything about this moment.

With the gentlest fingers, Stefan traces the lines. "I'm sorry," he whispers, unsure what he's even apologising for. "I'm so sorry you hurt the way you do." All he wants to do is make it better, but he doesn't know how. "Don't move," he says, and then gets up. He walks dazedly across the large corridor to his own bedroom to get a first aid kit Zach kept around.

When he gets back to the room, Athena is curled into a ball on her side, her body trembling, and Stefan chokes back a broken sound.

"Baby," he immediately says. "Stretch out for me, okay? I need to make sure these are clean. Can you do that?"

It takes a bit of coaxing but Athena eventually relents, and Stefan grabs a hold of her hand. As carefully as he can, Stefan wets a cotton ball with disinfectant and carefully wipes at the marks on Athena's thighs.

And on her stomach.

It's an accident that he sees them at all, Athena's t-shirt riding up.

When he's finished, Stefan redresses her and covers her in a light blanket. He stays kneeling at the edge of the bed as Athena stares at him with those same haunted eyes that hold nightmares. "You have to stop," he says.

"I know."

"I know you know," he murmurs. "You need to stop."

"I'm trying."

Stefan closes his eyes, his hand automatically reaching out to touch Athena's cheek. "Get some sleep," he says. "We'll talk more tomorrow."

* * *

They don't.

* * *

It isn't as if Stefan doesn't try.

He does.

Every day.

It's a feat in itself to get Athena alone and, even then, the girl acts aloof and guarded. She makes it very clear to Stefan that she doesn't want to talk about it.

At all.

And as the days go on things keep happening.

The founders party comes and goes (Stefan had tried to ask Athena but she blew him off and he ended up going with Elena), Elena finding out about vampires. Vicki being turned and then killed. Jeremy being compelled. It all just goes on. And he gets so caught up in the mess and the drama...and Athena just doesn't. She just avoids and keeps going as if nothing has happened.

And Stefan has to accept that Athena won't talk to him.

* * *

He doesn't.

He can't.

He's determined to talk to Athena, and the witch is determined not to.

* * *

So, they fight.

Endlessly.

It goes on and on, Stefan pushing and Athena pushing right back.

Both of them hurting.

* * *

"Why do you look like you haven't slept in five hundred days?" Caroline asks, dropping into the seat beside her friend at breakfast in the cafeteria.

Athena rubs her eyes of sleep, her heart jumping. "Probably because I haven't."

"What's up with you?"

"Oh, so many things," she mutters, her eyes automatically flicking Stefan's way, he sits with Elena, always with Elena (talk about couple goals). She can't even be mad at him because, frankly, Athena believes she too would have pushed for conversation. Then: "Do I actually have to drag you to choir practice today or are you going to come willingly?"

Caroline scoffs. "I still don't know why you signed me up for that shit," she says, showing her irritation. "I can't even sing."

"Liar," Athena accuses. "Just come to one practice, okay? It's fun."

"I highly doubt that."

"Please," Athena says, batting her tired eyelashes. "If you don't like it, you can quit."

She groans, as if this is a huge self-sacrifice. "If I must," she says; "and don't think I'm going to forget you said that."

"I won't," she says.

"Why the sudden interest in choir anyway?" Caroline asks. "If I recall correctly, you weren't in it last year. And I get the classical music thing because I mean no one can play a piano like you and if I have to make up a club for you to teach me how to play so be it. But Choir? You never seemed big on singing."

Athena presses her lips together, trying to determine the best way to explain herself. "I stopped singing," she eventually says. "After… everything that happened, I stopped singing, and I spent part of the summer trying to get back to it. It's something I love, and I hated that it was something else that was taken away from me."

Caroline merely nods.

"I love to sing," she says. "And dance. I've always loved it, and I'm allowing myself to enjoy it again. Surprisingly our school has a great Cultural program, and I have great, great plans."

Caroline eyes her thoughtfully. "You got really menacing there, for a second," she says, hit, once more, by the feeling that she doesn't know Athena at all.

"Plans, Carebear," she almost sings. "I have so many plans."

* * *

In terms of extracurriculars, Athena's are heavily culturally-based. However, she has to participate in at least two sessions of physical activity a week, which she easily does by signing up for another dance class along with cheerleading and cross country, her body has to stay the way she wants it.

(And if that means waking up at four a.m to run five miles and then cheerleading practice after school everuday and then dance after that on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so be it.)

On Mondays, Athena sings with the large school choir. It consists of both boys and girls, all their voices blending together at the hands of their choir director, James. He's young and obviously talented, and it's no secret to any of them that he likes Athena's voice. It's big and bold and smooth and caressing, and it's easy to fall in love with it.

Stefan isn't in choir.

He doesn't do anything in regards to extracurriculars.

Until one day he walks past the room and hears her.

Athena's voice steals something from him.

That's what she is.

Athena Medici is a thief, just taking and taking: his heart, his thoughts, and now a piece of his soul.

* * *

"Athena?"

She freezes mid-step, schools her features and turns to look at Stefan. "Hey," she says; "what's up?"

Without spooking the girl, he takes a slow step forward. "I just wanted to say thank you."

Athena frowns. "For what?"

"All your help for that Calculus test," he says. "I got my mark back. Apparently, I'm not as hopeless as I initially feared."

At the sound of that, Athena's mouth tilts upwards into an easy smile. "I'm glad to hear that," she says, relaxing slightly. "And, you're welcome. I'm glad I could help."

"You're actually a really good tutor."

Athena arches an eyebrow. "Try not to sound so surprised," she comments.

"No, I just mean - uh - I don't even know what I mean." He sighs. "You're just good at it," he finishes lamely.

"Thank you."

Stefan knows he shouldn't push. They're having their first, easy conversation since that night a little over two weeks ago, and he would do well to enjoy this moment. But, alas, Stefan is Stefan and he doesn't heed his own warning.

All he has to say is 'Athena' in that voice, and the ease of Athena's demeanour instantly vanishes. She tenses, her face twisting into something passive, and she begins her escape.

"I should go," she immediately says, and Stefan wants to kick himself.

Stefan steps forward. "Okay," he says; "I know you don't want to talk about it, and I'm definitely not going to force you, but answer me this: have you stopped?"

Athena's eyes narrow, growing noticeably harder.

"Tell me you've stopped," Stefan forces out, his hands twitching at his sides to stop himself from reaching out. Now that he knows what Athena's skin feels like under his fingertips, close proximity is exponentially more dangerous, because all he wants to do is touch. "Please."

Athena falters at the sincerity in his voice. "I have stopped," she says, almost conspiratorially.

Stefan can see the truth in her eyes, but there's something else there, as well. She might have stopped this, but that isn't to say she hasn't found other ways to hurt herself.

Sometimes, people are entirely too good at that.

"Why do you care so much?" Athena suddenly asks, surprising them both.

"I just do."

"But, why?"

Stefan sighs. "I don't know what to tell you," he confesses, somewhat truthfully. "It's for any number of reasons that you may or may not believe, but I do care, Athena, and I don't want to see you in pain."

Athena swallows audibly. "Who are you?"

"Still don't know anything about me, do you?"

"I'm trying," she replies, which they both know isn't a response to Stefan's question.

And, the thing is, she definitely is trying, and he can't help feeling slightly smug that maybe, somehow, in his little fantasy, that, one day, Athena won't have to try so hard anymore.

* * *

Athena and Stefan's biggest fight occurs a little over a week before she intends to open the tomb for Damon.

Everything has changed in so little time.

Elena wants him but hates him for being who he is, Damon only wants the tomb open for Katherine, Bonnie despises all things Salavatore, and Athena is just Athena. Unattached. Unbothered. Athena.

It happens as he comes home one day to see Damon and her talking about the best way to go about it.

Elena is with him, attached as she always is these days. They are no closer to being in a relationship, but everyone around them assumes they are. Elena wants. Stefan isn't sure.

All he knows is he doesn't like what he sees in front of him.

Athena and Damon dancing around each other with smiles and laughter and teasing, and Stefan knows, just knows that they've been having these little meetings for much longer than today.

Perhaps it's the jealousy.

Or just plain anger at being ignored by Athena while she goes off to dance and drink with Damon.

It's the end of a long day, and he's irritable and exhausted. It's a heady combination, and he can feel something sparking as he stands and listens to Athena run through her plans in that infuriatingly efficient way she always does. She's always so put together, hiding who she is, and it annoys Stefan to no end.

He doesn't know how or why it even starts, but it does.

He thinks he makes a comment about Athena's controlling nature under his breath that Athena must hear because she stops speaking mid-word. Her eyes flick Stefan's way for a moment, before she clears her throat and continues to go over something with Damon.

For a moment, Athena isn't sure what to say. She thinks it would do them well to ignore the comment about control completely, but it's just hanging in the air between them and Athena feels off-balance.

"Do you know I have a bunker on another property in case there is a Zombie Apocalypse?" Damon suddenly says, completely off topic, and Athena turns incredulous eyes on him. "Oh, I'm very prepared."

Athena's eyes narrow. "And your brother calls me the anal one," she says, letting her irritation show.

Stefan sighs. "Yeah, about that," he says, intending to apologise... and then just not doing it.

He knows Athena overcorrects to make up for some insecurity she has based on who she is, and Stefan, well, he pushes.

And, true to form, Athena pushes right back, saying hurtful words she won't even remember saying... right in front of Elena and Damon.

Neither of them seems to care and it quickly explodes into something ugly; something neither of them is particularly proud of. They're quick, well-placed jabs that end with Stefan (more so the ripper than him, but overall as much as he would like to pretend they aren't one in the same...the ripper and Stefan are.) calling Athena a heartless girl who has too many control issues to have any real friends. It's a low blow and Athena looks particularly stricken by the words, and the guilt immediately slams into Stefan.

The Salavtore blinks rapidly, the apology on the tip of his tongue...

Athena steps back, schooling her features. She ignores the gaping mouth and wide eyes of Elena, and turns to Damon "Can you handle this?" she asks, her tone clipped.

Swallowing audibly, he just nods.

And then Athena walks out, her head high. It's not that she's fleeing or escaping. She's merely walking out, and then all eyes are on Stefan.

Well, of course.

His mind is spinning and he's suddenly exhausted. They've never fought that way before. He's never attacked Athena like that, never wanted to.

It's just... everything.

This fight hurts in ways the others never have because, this time, it wasn't even a little bit about the challenge or pushing her to be better. No, it's none of that at all. In fact, it probably isn't even about Athena in any way.

It's about Stefan.

* * *

"Athena."

Athena swallows nervously, her heart stuttering in her chest. "You wanted to talk to me."

Caroline looks up from the document in front of her and offers her a warm smile as she settles into a chair opposite. "Yeah, Elena has been telling everyone at school...about what happened," she says, her voice gentle.

Almost as if it's a habit, Athena glances over her shoulder at the door to her room... that is still open.

Okay.

She's fine.

"Are you referring to the disagreement I had with Stefan?" she asks carefully.

"I am."

Athena deflates slightly. "I know I assured you everything would be... fine," she says. "And, I suppose, for the most part, it is. We just caught each other on a rough day. It manifested in an ugly way. It probably won't happen again."

"It probably will."

"No," she argues softly. "We'll definitely fight, sure, because we're both stubborn and determined and passionate, but it will never be like that again."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because," she says. "For all I've ever done in my life, I've never wanted to hurt, and I intend never to do that to Stefan ever again."

It's not the response Caroline's expecting and, for the longest time, she's not sure what to make of it. "Well, okay," she finally says. "So does that mean...some part of you cares for Stefan?"

"He's my friend. I care about all of my friends."

Slowly, Athena rises to her feet. "I have to go on a run," she says, and then starts to walk out. She's almost to the door when Caroline calls out for her and she spins to face her.

"Do you hurt still?" she asks, her gaze meeting Caroline's.

Athena smiles sadly. "Always."

* * *

"Something is wrong with me," Stefan declares, he's rubbing his face as he lets Lexi in. She closes the door behind her but makes no move any further into the room.

"And you've just now figured that out," Lexi teases, barely looking away from her phone screen.

"Shut up," he mutters. "I need your help."

At this, Lexi does look up, her blue eyes searching. "What's wrong?" she asks.

"Athena isn't talking to me."

Lexi frowns. "I thought she never talked to you, anyway."

"No, she used to talk to me, sort of," he explains. "It wasn't anything profound and it was mainly to do with superficial things or schoolwork, but it's different now. Now, she says nothing. Nothing, Lexi. Not even a hello, how are you. I may as well not even exist."

"Well, can you blame her?" Lexi says, offering no sympathy. "You did say some asshole things."

Stefan bristles. "She did too."

"As a response to feeling attacked," she clarifies. " From what you told me we both know she was always going to do that."

"So, what is she doing now, oh ye God of all things Athena Medici?"

Lexi rolls her eyes in a very Damon-like way. "She's protecting herself," she says, as if it's the simplest thing in the world. "She's doing it the only way she knows how."

Stefan lets out a long-suffering groan. "But I haven't talked to her in days. Surely, she's forgiven me by now."

"Have you even said you're sorry?"

Stefan drops his gaze.

Lexi chuckles. "Something is wrong with you."

Stefan shakes his head. "That isn't meant to be funny," he says. "I honestly do feel as if something is wrong with me. I feel sick and unsettled and why isn't she talking to me?" He sounds miserable, and Lexi's eyebrows rise in quiet understanding.

Oh.

"Why does she continually do this to me?" he asks, his voice catching.

Maybe it's meant to be a rhetorical question, but Lexi still answers, saying the one thing to send Stefan into even more of a tailspin.

"Maybe she likes you."

It's absurd, of course, because no.

Just, no.

There's no way.

"Lexi, you have to stop saying things like that," he says, pressing his palms against the door. "Athena does not like me. Neither does she like Brett, David, Greg or any other boy who stares at her all the _damn_ time." Stefan sighs. "You've been wrong before, and you're wrong about this too."

Lexi twists in her chair to look at Stefan with knowing, insightful eyes. It's terrifying, and Stefan feels as if he's two feet tall. "Maybe I am," she finally says, relenting. "But, I will tell you this, Stef: there's a reason you get under her skin the way you do."

"Well, obviously," he scoffs. "I'm the only one who actually challenges her."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you the only one to push and challenge her?" Lexi questions, sounding entirely too calm about this entire thing.

"Because she needs me to."

"Oh, come now, we both know that's not it."

Stefan shakes his head. "It can't be anything else," he argues. "It's not as if I actually enjoy doing it."

"Tisk, tisk, Stefan," Lexi says, giving him a skeptical look. "Let's not start lying now. You call me and talk about how frustrating she is-"

The air in his lungs tightens and he sags against the door. "Okay, so, maybe I do enjoy it a little," he confesses quietly. "I like the challenge. I've always liked the challenge."

"So, this is about the challenge, and not about Athena?"

"Exactly."

"Okay."

Stefan does a double take. "Okay?"

"Was there something else?"

Stefan growls in annoyance as he pushes off the door and moves towards his friend. "You're supposed to be helping me," he says. "Why aren't you helping me?"

"There's only so much I can do when you're refusing to help yourself," she says. "I don't know what else you want me to tell you."

Stefan throws himself on the bed, his forearm coming to rest over his eyes. "I miss her," he confesses, whispering the words into the air. "I don't even know what I could possibly even miss about her, but I do. I miss all of her."

Lexi looks on with sympathy. "Then I suggest you talk to her," she says. "Say you're sorry, talk it out, and maybe you'll both come out better for it."

Stefan groans. "What if she hates me?" he asks. "I mean, I called her heartless and of course Elena told people. That kid, Jacob, even wrote an article about it in the school paper."

"All the more reason to talk to Athena."

"Is that all you have for me?"

"Short of suggesting that you're the one who probably likes her, yeah, that's all I have."

Stefan freezes, suddenly grateful his face is half-hidden by his arm. Did she - did she just say that? Stefan isn't even sure how he's supposed to recover from that... accusation. Does Lexi expect a response? Because, honestly, Stefan doesn't think he has one.

Still, he attempts to gather himself, sits up and looks at his friend. He's just about to speak when Lexi raises her hand to silence him.

"Don't," she warns. "Don't call it absurd or ridiculous. Whatever your thoughts on the matter, don't insult us both by denying it."

Stefan's shoulders slump. "When did you get so smart?"

"I've always been smart," she says easily; "you just weren't paying attention. And by the way why does that Elena girl look like Katherine?"


	5. Chapter 5

_**Queen Athena**, He addresses her, and **my lady**, but they sound like insults from his tongue, politeness and deference twisted into mockery.__It's the way his lips twitch into a lopsided smile. In the sarcastic drawl of his voice. In the glint in his eyes as he measures her like she is a simple courtesan._

_She pulls her cloak tighter around herself, glaring at him from across the deck. The sun catches the silver handle of his sword, a bright flash that almost hurts her eyes, and she turns back to watch the sea that lies ahead, still and silent under blue august skies. In less than a week's time, she'll be setting foot on new soil, a foreign place with foreign people._

_She knows as deeply as one can that Niklaus Mikaelson doesn't consider her a queen. He didn't care for the customs of her people._ _But that doesn't matter now. Not with so little time left._

* * *

* * *

_She can feel the weight of the crown on her head. Something she promised she would never give up. As much as she resents Niklaus's presence and his attitude, he let her keep her crown, and for that she is grateful._

* * *

_"How about a game of chess?" he asks, leaning into the doorway of her quarters like he owns the ship and she's the one hitching a ride rather than the other way around._

_It's past nightfall and her ladies in waiting have already gone to their own cabins after attending to Athena. It's improper for Niklaus to be here, as improper as his suggestion._

_Of course, Athena knows that Niklaus does not care. He doesn't care for much she finds. That's why he makes no effort to hide his 'intimacies' with the many ladies on board._

_She see his teeth marks._

_"Surely it would be more appropriate if you asked Kol."_

_He snorts, and the derogatory note in his voice makes it clear what he thinks of that suggestion. "While I am sure my brother makes a decent executioner," he pauses to smirk knowingly at her, "he lacks the patience to be a good chess player. I prefer my opponents to pose a little more of a challenge. It makes the victory so much sweeter."_

_The gall of that man. The implication that he's taking victory for granted grates on her nerves. Of course, that's the whole point; it's a tactical move to appeal to her competitiveness, to ensure she's not going to deny the game. Of course, she knows that._

_It doesn't stop her from tilting her head and pointing to the chess set on the small corner table.__"Very well, my lord. Set up the board, then."_

_The look of satisfaction make her want to take her words back, but she holds her tongue._

_Changing her mind now would seem like a weakness, worse than allowing herself to be manipulated into agreeing in the first place._

_Her eyes follow him as he walks into her cabin, pulling the door shut behind him. The room is large enough but she can't quite shake the feeling of claustrophobia. It's not a new experience. Niklaus does that everywhere. Even large halls and spacious chambers seem to shrink themselves in his presence. It's a skill he shares with all his siblings (well the ones she has met anyways), and even a skill present in Athena's mother, whereas Athena herself never quite learned to master it. She isn't sure if she wants to, she always prefered being the ruler who was loved rather than feared.__"I presume you prefer white?"_

_It's amazing how much condescension Niklaus puts into that assumption. Truth is, Athena doesn't care much for the colors' potential symbolism, nor is she particularly keen to be the one to open the game._

_She raises an eyebrow. "And you? Black for your aesthetic if nothing more?"_

* * *

* * *

_His lips twitch, and she knows she won the opening gambit without moving a single figure yet._

* * *

_Athena beats Niklaus in twenty three moves.__It's rather fitting that it is her queen who lures him into a checkmate at the end._

_His fingers brush against her as he reaches across the board and offers the black king to her in a effusive gesture of defeat, and the touch lingers a moment too long.__"Well played, Queen Athena. May I offer you my services for a prize for your victory?"_

_"I would rather decline," Athena offers with a smile infused in fake sweetness. "I've seen too many times what your vows of loyalty are worth." It's a pity really, because someone with Niklaus's experience in politics and his ruthlessness in getting what he wants would be a valuable asset if she were still on her throne, facing the hounds that wanted her crown. But its not worth the risk of finding herself stabbed in the back, metaphorically or literally._

_Instead of being offended, Niklaus throws back his head and laughs, deep and geunine and rich like the full bodied wine Athena had too much of during the game. "While that certainly is a wise choice, those really weren't the kind of services I was offering."_

_He lets his gaze trail lazily over her, from head to toe and back, lingering on her clevage and lips, on where her hands are resting in her lap, still holding his king in her fingers. It takes her a moment too long to understand his meaning, and when she finally does, the sheer audacity of the offer renders her speechless and sputtering._

"_You're mad."_

_Leaning back into his chair, he watches her with eyes heated by wine and unconcealed desire, the black of his pupils almost swallowing the the blue completely.__"Come on, Athena."_

_She swallows deeply when she realizes this is the first time he gives her no title. "I'm sure your ladies have shared all the delightfully indiscreet things I can do. Aren't you a little curious? I suspect you've hardly been blessed with skilled lovers in the past. Queens are meant to hold onto their virtues with a grip so iron clad," He pauses a small smile teasing his lips. " Of course the experience you faced prior that drove you away from your throne-"_

_She's at her feet at once.__The sound of her flat hand connecting with his cheek loud in the cabin, louder than the sea raging outside. "Don't you dare-"_

_He catches her wrist before she can hit him again. "Relax. I wasn't belittling what you went through, I was merely making a point. What those men did to you-"_

_"Is none of your concern, Lord Niklaus." Her voice is icy enough to make him stand a little taller._

_Pulling her arm from his grip, she glares at him.__"You're welcome to keep slapping me if it so pleases you. Though I am sure that is not quite your sort of thing."_

_She flushes angrily, her cheeks turning a bronzed red. "It's not."_

_"I expected as such," he drawls, but he doesn't look like a man conceding any kind of defeat, standing far too close so she is unable to evade the heat of his body, nor the scent of wine and sea clinging to him._

_His dubious...offer still stands, that much is obvious, and he won't back down until Athena rejects him, firm and clear. She smiles warmly, invitingly, letting Niklaus even bend down to get closer to her lips.__"You're right my ladies and even the servants have spoken of how skilled a Mikaelson tongue is. Unfortunately they can never tell if its you or Kol, you two have the habit of running through the same women." She takes a step forward haughty and proud. "My bet is it's Kol."_

* * *

_She swiftly turns away after that. Letting him leave on his own, trying to ignore Kol's signature laughter from somewhere outside on the boat._

* * *

_When she wakes up in the morning, the sea is calm and still once again, glittering like a tapestry of emerald green and sapphire blue._

_On deck, the three Mikaleson's stand, engrossed in a conversation with the captain. By the way the captain and Rebekah exchange meaningful glances there is something more than friendship between them. It makes Athena smile some. Even though both Kol and Niklaus hold sour expressions._

_When she arrives all heads turn towards her.__"Queen Athena," Kol says, lip curling. "Captain turner informs us we should reach the port where are brother lays in wait for us in less than a day."_

_She inclines her head polietly. "Very well. What does that mean for me?"_

_"We still need you." Rebekah says quickly. Her blonde hair braided around in a crown on top her head. Her blues glimmering enough to rival the sea that stands behind her.__"Although you are still not familar with the customs of this land." Niklaus shifts uncomfortably, an off motion on him.__Offering his arm, she only hesitates for a second before taking it and being moved away further on the deck.__"What of it?" Athena speaks offhandedly._

_"This land captializes of the sale and seizure of men, women, and children with skin like yours."_

_His words make her look down at her arms compared to his. She is a light golden brown whereas he looks like porcelain. For a second Athena evaluates her obvious differences from all around her. Her hair isn't as stringy and straight as theirs, her's is spiral curls that reach to her waist. Her eyes look different too. Much wider and open and the color of the pure gold she wears on her wrists, neck, and ears. Hell even her body shape wasn't like theres. While they were tall and willowy, she was short and curvy._

_She supposes she should have expected as such from this foreign land.__"Why?"_

_"Power, money, hatred, wanting to feel special by making others feel less. There are many reasons why. Do you understand what this means for you?"_

_She feels a rush of anger so deeply she doesn't know exactly how to handle it. And her eyes almost burn with tears. Standing upwards stiffly. "I am a queen. I am not a slave."_

_He smirks, looking pleased. "Good, hold onto that fire. My family will keep you protected, but you will have to burn those who will think less of you."_

_She sighs, the breath bringing forth the smell of the sea. "If that is all-"_

_"I am afraid not. You must wear a corset."_

_She curses rather loudly at that._

* * *

_She is a vision in burgundy and gold._

_The dress, made of the finest of fabrics so no one could ever question her place in society. It's a purposeful move on Niklaus's part. The corset is uncomfortable and she can see the way he grins when he catches sight of her cleavage.__It makes her want to slap him again.__When they arrive to the dock and the servants are working tirelessly to unload, she stands, firm, watching the man who waited on shore for their arrival.__He has thick chocolate hair and matching eyes._ _And when he greets her his face never changes._

_"I am Elijah Mikaelson, It is a pleasure to meet you your grace."_

_He offers his hand up and smiles at her hesitance. "I won't hurt you."_

_Raising an eyebrow she laizily drops her hand in his, "Yet."_

_He seems surprised by her pessimistic nature yet still places a crodial kiss on her hand. Athena nearly flinches away from how cold his lips are. And when she looks into his eyes all she sees is an empty vault of nothing._

_**How can you hide away so easily**?__It doesn't take long for the others to come forth while she keeps her attention on the sea. She will miss it's night rages and the rocky feeling of the sea beneath her. It all happened so fast and yet so slow._

* * *

_One minute she was laughing with her friends, often finding herself gazing wistfully out the palace windows ruling as any queen should. The next is she is disgraced and forced off her throne._

* * *

Her mind reels from her dream as she jumps awake, her hand reaching for a crown that isn't there.

* * *

Stefan loses patience with himself - and Athena - when Lexi insists they go out to celebrate. And Lexi being Lexi, wants him to talk to Athena first, before the fun can begin.

So here they are, outside the Medici mansion.

He's all bravado as he exits the car, but he's a shaking mess by the time he's bypassed the mansion and gone straight for the house he knows through Caroline, that Athena lives in. He calls on courage as he lifts his hand and knocks on the door.

"Come in."

Stefan sighs. He was kind of hoping that Athena would actually answer the door. Maybe if he just waits out here for a while, she will be forced to -

The door opens.

Stefan's breath catches.

Athena looks equally taken aback. "Stefan," she breathes in surprise before she clears her throat. There isn't a smile in sight. "Are you - umm - is everything okay?"

He takes a deep breath and exhales slowly. "No, Athena," he says, all of it just coming tumbling out. "Everything is not okay, because we haven't spoken in a while and I hate it, and I'm sorry, okay? I know I'm mainly to blame for, well, everything, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Athena instantly deflates. "Oh, Stefan," she murmurs. "I'm sorry, too."

"I was convinced you must hate me, and just the idea of never talking to you again is..." he trails off.

"Yeah," Athena quietly agrees. "It's been a strange couple of days. I didn't realise how much time we actually spend together."

Stefan feels the melancholy roll off the Goddess, and he risks a step forward. All he wants to do is reach out and touch her; reassure her in some way. "I don't want to fight like that ever again."

"Ditto," Athena says, sucking in a breath. "We won't."

"No, we won't."

She manages a small smile. "Caroline did a great job of the Grill for your birthday," she says. "I just got back from there, and they're just finishing up with the final touches."

There's something in her voice that forces Stefan to take yet another step forward. "Are you not going?"

Athena ducks her head slightly. "Honestly?"

"Always."

"I was hoping I would be able to skip it," she confesses; "but It's your birthday and If I miss it the school will be brimming with rumors, you know?"

"Probably," he agrees, "Why wouldn't you want to go?"

Athena nibbles at her bottom lip, visibly thinking about her response. "I think it's the idea of being around that many people," she finally says; "everyone still has so many questions and mix that with alcohol, they don't care how it comes out. They just want to know."

Stefan remains silent, his eyes never straying from Athena's perfect face.

"I guess I do enough avoiding in everyday life; It gets tiring," she adds with a shrug, as if she's revealed nothing remotely profound.

"I get that," Stefan finds himself saying.

Athena hums. "I think you do."

They stare at each other for the longest time and, the moment Stefan reaches out for her; Athena flinches. It's nothing to do with him, they're both sure, but it doesn't make the hurt or guilt any less.

"I'm sorry," he says, automatic and true.

"No," Athena says. "I'm sorry."

Stefan shakes his head. "I think this conversation has had enough apologies."

"I agree," she mumbles. Then: "I assume you're going to the grill?"

"I am."

"Can I ask you to stay? I know you and Lexi probably have some plans but I have alcohol and- and I got something for you. For your brithday."

"You did?" His eyebrows jump up and he genuinely looks shocked. "And you know about Lexi?"

She smiles. "Elena talks a lot."

He chuckles then, because, of course.

Athena laughs lightly, the light reaching her eyes in a way that steals Stefan's breath. If Athena is going to keep smiling at him that way, he's going to end up doing everything he possibly can to make sure it stays. "Come on, aren't you curious?"

Instead, his hands twitch at his sides. "I am," he agrees.

It's definitely going to be interesting.

* * *

When Stefan finally escapes the hurricane of emotions he's feeling in Athena's presence, he goes straight to the car needing the insight only his surprising blonde friend can offer.

Lexi is sprawled out fiddling with something on her phone and threading through her hair.

It's a picture of ease, and Stefan loves it.

"You were right," Stefan suddenly says, his eyes on Lexi. "But, you were also wrong."

"Oh?"

"It's more than that," he whispers, as if the confession is too profound to say in a normal voice. It might be, for all he knows, because he should not feel anymore for this girl who's walls are so high she doesn't let anyone in.

And, when he realises that, his chest burns.

His body follows a beat later.

* * *

Lexi being the pro she is at helping him comes back to the house, any evidence of his emotional rollercoaster wiped away.

Lexi emits all the charm she can and in less than a minute she has Athena endeared to her. All smiles and warmth.

So if three of them ignore his birthday party, and instead stay in watching cartoons and drinking cheap wine...well it's no one's business but theirs.

* * *


	6. chapter 6

When Athena Medici first arrives in Mystic Falls, Virgina, she is still Lyla Medici.

She's still wearing her thick-rimmed glasses, carrying the excess baby fat that just refuses to go, and is so painfully silent that she's practically unnoticeable.

But that was all quickly and painfully derailed when her mother received a panicked phone call from New Haven.

See there was a time where Lyla had an older sister. Where they were a family of four, instead of three.

Elizabeth Medici, Lyla's older sister by seven years, had a nervous breakdown at the end of her second year at Yale, and every plan Lyla had went flying out the window, only to be replaced by her plans that directly involved her sister.

A sister who immediately comes home.

A sister who sometimes feels like a stranger to Lyla.

And Lyla has been doing anything and everything remotely possible to keep her sister here. She's being the perfect daughter, doing extra chores and not giving her parents any stress at all. She does all she's told to do, not bothering anyone with any of her childish problems, all while she watches.

As closely as she dares.

While nobody has actually explicitly told Lyla what happened in New Haven, she's been able to hear snippets from conversations going on all around her, and she's learned more than she ever needs to.

She cries the first time Uncle David - confirms what she suspected, and she hates the man a little bit for being so blasé about it, even going so far as to blame her mother's side of the family for 'bad genes.'

Elizabeth's 'nervous breakdown' is actually a euphemism for a suicide attempt.

Lyla's at that age where she understands, but also doesn't.

So, in trying to comprehend properly, she does what she does best and reads about it. She visits the library over the summer - only when she's sure her mother is home - and she spends hours reading about depression and psychology on various websites. It's definitely not happy reading, and she finds learning about the struggles people go through begin to affect her own mood.

It makes her sad; makes her accept her own reality.

It's not as if she doesn't recognise the signs in herself. She's never really been happy with herself. She's too fat and she's too ugly. She's too quiet and too intense for her age. She's been hated enough in her lifetime to wish she didn't exist on numerous occasions. She's wanted so badly to disappear, convinced that everyone's life would just be so much better and simpler if she weren't around.

It's a shock to her system to learn that her sister entertains the same thoughts.

Lyla doesn't immediately talk to Elizabeth about it. She wants to, but doesn't really know how. It would be easy to blame the parenting - there parents have always put a lot of intentional pressure on their daughters to be perfect - but it's a lot more than that.

Uncle David is at least right about some of it.

The Medici girls are genetically predisposed to be diagnosed with anxiety disorders and clinical depression. It's apparent in both sides of the family, with their Mother losing one sister and one cousin to suicide already. She has another sister with bipolar disorder and attempts of her own, and their mother has been fighting a battle with alcoholism for a while.

And after Elizabeth runs away to a place she can't come back from...her name isn't allowed to be spoken. It's just the three of them, and Lyla quickly becomes Athena. The Goddess of wisdom and battle strategy.

Because if she is going to survive this thing inside of her, she's going to need a hell of a battle strategy.

Bad genes, Uncle David had said, and Lyla sometimes thinks he's right.

* * *

Elena always knew Athena would be the one to ruin her life.

She'd known it the moment she laid eyes on her when they were kids, maybe even before that.

They didn't talk much freshmen year, they were friendly, but only through Caroline. Elena didn't really like Athena. She was viscous and kind at the same time. Rude yet polite. Real yet entirely false.

She was...cold.

Acting as if nothing ever mattered, so unapologetically harsh.

It was the summer after freshman year, for some reason Elena and Athena were fighting.

It was probably over nothing, per usual, but Athena had snarled and snapped at her, her face devoid of anything, just blank passivity. And then the anger washed away from her being and was replaced with sorrow, and somehow Elena was left feeling guilty.

It wasn't fair.

Because Athena was the one to hurt Elena.

Athena hurt her, did her best to make Elena's life miserable, and even though it didn't work (except for when it did) that's not the point.

Elena's the victim here.

And all she wanted to do is yell at her, tell her how obtuse and unfair this whole situation is. She wanted to hit her.

But she didn't.

"You look really pretty today Athena."

Inwardly Elena cursed herself as she meets Athena's watery eyes.

"I'm tired, Elena."

The Gilbert girl moved to sit by her, feels herself deflate as she placed her hand over Athena's.

"Me too."

This is how it begins.

* * *

It is a rather uneasy partnership at first. Her scar tissue, her self-hatred, both lying as the girls tried to forge a friendship, or at least something akin to trust.

Athena never begged forgiveness for being mean, or even offered understanding.

But she's sad and enchanting and surrounded by cold so Elena always let it go.

But not really, because that anger sat deep within her, growing into something twisted.

Eventually, Elena tried to break her **back** a couple of times. (But Athena was much better at causing permanent wounds) There were times where it looked like she might just succeed. That big mouth of Athena's would go silent, and gold eyes would glisten, and her jaw would slacken.

But she always bounced back.

Athena Medici was fucking invincible. Trying to break her only left Elena with a shattered fist, metaphorically speaking.

It seems the only one who could break her was herself.

No one saw it coming. (A part of Elena saw it coming but she likes to pretend that part never did.)

Athena was the girl who told jokes and took all insults with nothing more than a shurg. Everything was laid back and nothing was ever a big deal- it just was.

And it made Elena angry. So unreasonably angry because she couldn't undertsand why.

Athena was fine.

Athena was okay.

Nothing was wrong with her. So why?

And then she came back as if nothing happened, only she became more.

People always admired her despite her cold exterior. Now she was warm and everyone wanted to sit in her light, or maybe it wasn't light at all, maybe it was just heat.

Elena doesn't know. She doesn't understand what's going on beneath Athena's skin.

All she knew was that Stefan was drawn to it, to her.

She watches them arrive. Late as all get out, Athena, Lexi, and Stefan.

(Elena had called Stefan and nearly begged him to attend).

They share easy smiles amongst themselves and look so close, and jealousy boils beneath her skin. Because why Athena, out every girl? Why the only one who's ever made Elena question her worth?

But she forces a smile and approaches Stefan, because she's not giving up.

Not on this.

And Athena can fuck off if she thinks otherwise.

* * *

Athena's angry. The arched brow and the all-to familiar glare is sign enough that Elena should be running, far, far away right now.

But she doesn't.

She just holds onto her hand, forcing her to stay close.

Her hand felt loose in Elena's grip, it was like she wasn't even trying to hang on.

"Why Stefan?" Elena finds herself asking, her hands shake and she wants to break into Athena's skin. "Out of all the options you have why did you have to choose Stefan."

Sometimes Elena just felt so stupid around Athena. She knew she wasn't a certified genius, but Elena Gilbert wasn't stupid. It shouldn't matter that Athena could keep up with the references Stefan would make about some book commonly thrown around in AP literature, because her and Stefan were...they were...epic.

And Athena just stares at her and walks away.

Like she's nothing.

* * *

After the third time she has to decline an offer to dance, Athena is ready to pull out her own hair. She knows, of course, that she could have attended this birthday party with any number of people as her date, but she just wasn't interested. She's treating this entire evening as part of her friendship responsibility, which means there's no time for... enjoyment. She wouldn't even know how to do that if she tried.

Really, what she would like to do now is sneak out the back and go up to her bedroom, lie on her carpet and stare at the ceiling.

"Athena?"

Her gaze snaps up to look at a sophomore boy, smiling at her with all the hope in his eyes. "Hello, Peter," she says easily, smiling back at him.

"Would you like to dance?" he asks, his earnest eyes tugging at what's left of her cold dead heart. "Pretty please?"

She chuckles lightly, says, "Sure," and lets him lead her to the dance floor.

"She's just dancing with him because he's safe," Lexi whispers to Stefan. "It doesn't mean anything."

Even if it doesn't, it doesn't make it hurt any less. "Will it always feel like this?" he asks.

"Probably."

"You're lucky."

"Am I?"

"The person you like actually likes you back."

Lexi can't stop her grin at the mention of her love, but she quickly schools her features. "That may be so, Salvatore, but the person I like also knows."

* * *

Athena lets out an unexpected giggle when Peter spins her and, for the first time all week, her smile is open and genuine. So, predictably, it floors the boy, and he stumbles slightly, which makes them both laugh.

"I thought for sure you would be a terrible dancer," Athena finds herself saying.

Peter pretends to look insulted. "Why? Why would you say such a thing?"

She laughs now, stepping forward and then back again. "You're really tall," she says.

He shrugs. "It does make me a little uncoordinated," he admits sheepishly. "I'm still growing into these pesky limbs."

"But you're not terrible," she clarifies.

"You're actually very good," he comments.

"Surprising, isn't it?"

He nods his head, his expression one of awe and something very serious. "I think there are many things surprising about you."

Athena places a gentle hand on his shoulder, suddenly knowing he's too young and good and pure for all the darkness living inside of her.

* * *

Damon couldn't help but soften at the sight of Athena.

She was unaware. And alone. Off to the sidelines after dancing with a boy and just observing everyone and everything around them.

She was wearing a form-fitting golden top, with lovely blue jeans that certainly brought out her curvaceous form, with a gold and green hairpiece that secured half of her intricate ringlets into place.

A cheerful melody began trickling out. Caroline, wobbling slightly towards the girl, brightened with a flash of excitement while grabbing for Athena's wrist; causing her friend to gasp with credible bewilderment. The blonde then proceeded to drag her friend out onto the dance floor, spinning around in a wild circle while clasping tightly onto her friend's outstretched hands. Athena laughed, shaking her head at Caroline's expense. Before long, there was a sea of girls twirling around the dance floor; and they all proceeded to spin and twirl and dance for the entirety of the lively song.

Once the dancing ended, and the music had shifted into a slower melody, Athena sauntered over to the edge of the dance floor where Damon was standing.

Once she had reached him, the girl smiled with exhilaration and inquired, a little breathless herself, "do you not dance, Damon?"

Aware of the many surrounding eyes and ears of the other party-goers, Damon chuckled and shook his head slowly back and forth. "No, Medici, I don't."

"Athena!" She corrected him stubbornly, fixing her face into a phony pout.

"_Athena,_" Damon began, drawing a steady breath as he flicked his gaze back onto the witch's beaming face, "I prefer to casually observe… from the corner."

Athena lifted her chin and folded her arms at her chest, eyeing Damon suspiciously. "You don't dance? – are you certain that you're actually the 'fun' brother?"

Damon laughed loudly, despite himself. Once he had regained his composure he grinned widely and placed his empty glass casually atop the bar to his left. He met her intense stare and murmured with apparent dalliance, "I'm not so sure; you tell me which one of us is more fun."

"You're losing your rank, I must say –oh!"

Athena stopped short as Damon grabbed gently at her wrist, freeing her arms from their folded position at her chest. He then twirled her around, twice, and caught her against his knee; holding her for a moment within the protection of his arms. Athena's eyes were wide with shock, and her lips were parted slightly as she drew in rapid, startled breaths. Her chest lifted and dropped in a rhythm that didn't quite match the tempo ofthe music.

He straightened, pulling her upright with him, and released his hands while clearing his throat - loudly.

Athena proceeded to then laugh in the most charmingly cheerful way, glancing to Caroline in turn.

Unlike Athena, Caroline stared at her wth wide-eyed consternation; and it struck Damon -immediately- that his behavior may have been boldly misinterpreted.

Regardless, a dark and persistent voice whispered, Damon would do anything to keep that smile -pure and sweet- upon Athena's face for just a little while longer.

"So, you can dance!"

Damon shrugged his shoulders up, briefly, and teased, "beginner's luck."

"Hardly." Said Athena, with a coy smile.

Out of the corner of his eye, Damon could see Elena's glare, boring into the side of his face. And Stefan, her dance partner, frozen, but also to discover the pained expression that had taken hold of Stefans' astonished face.

* * *

He offered Lexi up like a lamb to be slaughtered.

And like most lamb.

She would have ended in blood.

If it wasn't for interference of Athena.

* * *

Damon isn't a creature of guilt.

And yet he can't get to sleep.

It's unsurprising, of course, but the exhaustion finally catches up with him and he tumbles into a restless slumber.

He dreams of Athena's eyes, dark and distrustful.

He dreams of Athena's screams and tears, loud and frightening.

He dreams of Athena's pain, ringing on a loop in his ears.

He dreams of blood.

* * *

Stefan drank human blood.

Athena had been reckless wrapping her body around Lexi so the only way to hurt the vampire was to go through her.

When the officer aimed that wooden bullet, ready to shoot Athena in the leg and then he did, Stefan just...he just reacted.

Biting through flesh. Taking down three officers and ready to go for Caroline's mother. Until Athena muttered some incantations and the sheriff slumped over in a deep sleep and he was held in place.

"She won't remember when she wakes up."

It was only then did Stefan dwell on how much of an aphrosidasic the scent of her blood was.

* * *

"Stefan," Lexi presses, hearing seeing his hesitance.

"They were going to hurt you," he whispers brokenly. "They were going to hurt her."

"It's okay," she assures him. "It's okay."

"She already hurts so much," Stefan says. "I couldn't let them hurt her any more."

"I- the ripper-"

"No."

"Lexi-"

"Look at you Stefan," Lexi hugged him close, pulling him towards the mirror. "You stopped. You didn't drain them dry. You killed them to save her because some part of you recognized you needed to stop. That she needed to be taken care of first."

And yet that same hunger, that twisted thing that begged for control, surged beneath his skin.

* * *

She's not strong.

When Athena was thirteen her father told her she was weak-willed. He wasn't cruel about it, it was just something he said one day. "You could be amazing, 'Thena, if you weren't so weak willed." He was smiling and her mother didn't say anything. That's how Athena knew it was true.

She hates this, this violent thing clawing at her chest.

And Elena dosen't help.

"You knew all along they were vampires? You knew and said nothing!" The girl sounds...betrayed, and is looking at her like there's something so wrong with her. Like she's emotionally disabled.

Athena sighs.

"Neither did you, but I suppose only Elena Gilbert is allowed to keep secrets, isn't that right?" The girl stepped forward and by the way Elena pulled back, wide eyes and all fear, she made a terrifying picture.

It's not that being unkind to Elena is some force of habit that requires manual override, it's just that she's angry and she hurts.

Her leg fucking hurts from the wooden bullet getting shot through it. It hurts.

And she fucking loves it.

* * *

Lexi is too afraid to leave him despite Damon. And when Athena comes the next day, limping and whimpering, Stefan offers her his blood.

The idea of seeing her lips smeared with him, of taking from him, of being her sole provider and protector leaves him unimaginably warm. And he wants.

He wanted to get to the heat of her. He needed to be inside of her. He needed to know what made her. And it wasn't physical. It wasn't sexual. It was...he slowly lowered his head until it rested between the valley of her breast, and in that position he found what he sought. The steady thump of her heart.

But he won't rip into her.

His ripper has more sense than that.

He just wants to keep her.

"Thank you," Athena whispers against his skin.

Stefan just sighs. "Athena - "

"I don't care what you say," she murmurs, gently interrupting. "I'm saying thank you and you're accepting it."

Stefan's eyes slip closed, the fight leaving him. "Yes, dear."

* * *

Damon had made himself suspiciously scarce, and for that Athena is grateful.

* * *

Much to Athena's long-suffering annoyance, Stefan spends a worrying amount of time with her during the first week of her recovery. (Due to her refusal to drink any blood.)

Whether it's out of guilt or some sick sense of masochism, Lexi doesn't know, but she finds it bothers her to no end.

Lexi watches them carefully, searching and waiting for the moment their tentative 'coupling' explodes, because they all know it's going to. It's only a matter of time before one of them loses patience with the other, because Athena is a terrible patient and Stefan is a doting carer.

It's inevitable, really.

Something's got to give.

* * *

It happens a week later while Stefan is walking Athena to her next class. The corridors are relatively empty, given that everyone else is on their way or already at their extracurriculars.

For some reason, it irritates Athena. She doesn't want Stefan to have to adjust his schedule for her. She doesn't want him to feel as if he has to. All of this; it's suffocating, and she can't seem to accept that Stefan is doing any of it because he wants to, and not because he feels obligated to.

"I think people have finally stopped staring," Stefan says conversationally.

Athena snorts. "At you, or at me?"

He tilts his head in thought. "Both," he finally decides. It's not as if they're that far from each other, anyway.

"How do you feel about that?" Stefan asks, his voice quiet.

She quirks an eyebrow. "What are you my therapist now?"

"I'm just wondering how you're doing, Athena."

"I'm fine."

Stefan wants to call her out, and, without heading his own warning, he does.

And, predictably, it escalates quickly, with Athena on the hurt defensive and Stefan on the persistent offensive. Questions are asked and deflected, demanded and avoided, until Athena practically growls in frustration and distaste as she grabs for her bag off Stefan's shoulder and squares up.

"Nobody asked you to do any of this! Dammit, Salvatore, I can take care of myself!" she snaps. "God knows I've been doing it long enough!"

Stefan is left utterly dumbfounded when Athena storms off without once looking back. What the hell? He's tempted to call after her, but the sound of slow clapping stops him, and he spins around to find a blond boy lounging on one of the window sills, his knowing eyes on him.

"Well done," the boy says, ceasing his clapping.

Stefan furrows his brow. "Excuse me?"

"I said well done," he repeats, sliding his feet to the ground and rising. "In all the time I've known Athena Medici, I don't think I've ever seen her react so... strongly. So, congratulations."

Stefan feels supremely uncomfortable. "I'm sorry, but, who are you?"

He moves towards him. "How rude of me," he says, holding out his hand. "The name's Leo. I think we have World Geography together."

Stefan shakes his hand, somewhat distractedly. "Stefan Salvatore," he says. Then, his curiosity getting the better of him, he asks, "You know Athena?"

"I don't think anyone actually knows Athena," he says, somewhat darkly. "But, yes, I suppose I do. We dated for a couple of months sophomore year."

"Oh."

He gives him a curious look. "Don't worry," he says. "I'm sure my relationship with her is long forgotten. It was more of a show, really. She was never quite into me, you know?"

No, Stefan doesn't know, but he still nods.

"Like I was saying, I've never seen anyone quite get under her skin the way you do," he says. "It's kind of funny, in a truly not funny way."

Stefan isn't sure what to make of any of this conversation.

"She's a special one, that Athena," he says wistfully. "She doesn't let just anyone in close enough to see it, so I'd be careful, if I were you."

Stefan swallows audibly, unsure how he feels hearing things his subconscious already knows.

"You keep pushing and pushing," he says, almost conversationally. "It's all good and innocent now, but you don't know her at all. You keep calling her out for always being in control, but you have absolutely no idea what she's been through. You don't know how alone she forces herself to feel, so the guilt doesn't eat her alive. You don't know anything. Because, if you did, you wouldn't push as much as you do. She may look strong, but she's fragile, and you need to be careful, Stefan." He closes his eyes for a moment. "I get scared that, one of these days, you're going to push just hard enough for her to fall off the edge."

Once again, Stefan is left shocked, rooted to the spot, as the blond head walks away from him.

What the hell?

Like, just, what the actual hell?


End file.
